Woke up this mornin'--smelled like swine
But somethin' tells me THAT it's fine
My mama says that what counts is what's under the hood
Whoa yeah!

Which compels me not to bathe when I should
(What compels me? Why ain't I bathin'?)

I'm the kind of girl who's got no guy
But I can tell, it's just 'CAUSE they're shy
Won't stand close to me--thinkin' I'm too good
(Won't stand with me, I'm misunderstood)

What compels me not to bathe when I should?
(What compels me? Why ain't I bathin'?)

Dated online for a minute or two
But when we met he told me that we were through
I said "I've fallen in love!"
He said "You need to fall in a tub!"
He said "You need to fall in a tub!"

Some think I'm nuts and some think I'm mad
But I happen to think there's fun TO be had
I once wasted time with shampoo; I'd go back if I could
(Time wasted washin', I'd go back if I could)

Time compels me not to bathe when I should
(What compels me? Why ain't I bathin'?)

(Time compels me; not into bathin', ahhh)

Though I'm alone, I will stand my ground
I'm waitin' for my dream guy to COME around
He's tall, dark, and handsome and HIS nose is made outta wood
(HIs sniffer doesn't work, it's made outta wood!)

Love compels me not to bathe when I should
(Love compels me...no need for bathin')

Love compels me not to bathe when I should
(Love compels me...no need for bathin')

(repeat to fade)