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Song Parodies -> "Cry "Conviction!""

Original Song Title:

"My Conviction"

Original Performer:

Hair (Musical)

Parody Song Title:

"Cry "Conviction!""

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

This is an improved version of Bygone Fiction (q.v.). Both were inspired by a Weekly Standard magazine article "The phony campus rape crisis" by Heather MacDonald.

You know kids, I wish every mom and dad
Would make a speech to their teenage sons
And say "Kids, be free, be whatever you are,
"Do whatever you want to do,
"Just so long as you don't hurt anybody.
"And remember kids, I am your friend."


I just would like to say, as victims cry "Conviction!",
That longing stares and other annoying perpetrations
Without clear "Yes!" are nothing more
Than the male's emergence from his drab campus-lodge
Into the broads-and-booze age,
Itching from dearth; might proffer sex.

Spare us yuppie rulers' notion that swellings at cleavage
And hindquarters are not proper for the male;
When fa-a-a-actually,
Females males' playthings are, in most mammals.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rob Arndt - November 16, 2015 - Report this comment
I'm always amazed at the young women who dress like whores and guzzle beer, looking for leather wearin' hunks while sexting... then go on camera to complain about lewd male behavior on campus!!! 555 double standards!

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