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Song Parodies -> "I'll Never Zeta-Jones"

Original Song Title:

"You'll Never Walk Alone"

Original Performer:

Gerry & the Pacemakers

Parody Song Title:

"I'll Never Zeta-Jones"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

My boss wouldn't give me the day off. I don't think he bought my excuse that September 25 is a religious holiday. For on this day in 1969, a goddess was born.
When I walk
down the street
hang my head
down low.
It's not
from the fear
of the dark.

There she lives
on the block
with an olden guy
and a sweet penthouse view
Central Park.

"Walk on"
says the cop.
"Walk on"
his refrain.
And my dreams
are tossed
and blown.

Walk on
walk on
with break
in my heart
and I'll never Zeta-Jones.
I'll never Zeta-Jones.

Walk on
walk on
with break
in my heart
and I'll never Zeta-Jones!
I'll never Zeta-Jones!
Maybe "Epic Rap Battles of History" can put me "in the ring" with her old man... but she'd probably cheer him on.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   7

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

2Eagle - September 25, 2012 - Report this comment
Good one about crushes. She's a nice person.
Stupid Teabagger - September 25, 2012 - Report this comment
Sorry about your failures as a stalker.
Wendy Christopher - September 25, 2012 - Report this comment
Have you tried online stalking, Michael? ;) Very heartfelt parody - couldn't resist giving it 555.
Meriadoc - September 25, 2012 - Report this comment
Cheer up Michael! There's always Arwen. :)
Lifeliver - September 26, 2012 - Report this comment
I've never been Zeta'd but 555s for creative verb use - and v effective match.
Michael Pacholek - September 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Sadly, Arwen's parodies have become about as infrequent as my own -- although she had a good one today, about Nancy Grace-less.
Patrick - September 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Congratulations on being the first person to use the name Zeta-Jones as a verb.
Phil Alexander - September 26, 2012 - Report this comment
Peregrin - September 27, 2012 - Report this comment
Mike, have you tried Susaning Boyle? No? Wise man :)
LilNorCAL - September 28, 2012 - Report this comment
Lord Pacholek, let's not forget that a 'god' was born on that same day: Michael Douglas, her hot hubbbby!

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