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Song Parodies -> "Can't Keep My Hands Off Of You"

Original Song Title:

"Can't Keep My Eyes Off Of You"

Original Performer:

Frankie Valli

Parody Song Title:

"Can't Keep My Hands Off Of You"

Parody Written by:

Lionel Mertens

The Lyrics

You sound so cute when you moo
Can't keep my hands off of you
Your teats are pleasant to squeeze
I'd love to sample your cheese
I took one look at your mug
And bet the farm on your jugs
You sound so cute when you moo
Can't keep my hands off of you

Pardon the reach of my hands
I've grown attached to your glands
The four of them makes me glee
I could use some therapy
But with a cow of your ilk
Just call me crazy for milk
Your far to cute to be glue
I guess my heart's stuck on you


I'll milk ya Bessie, and with my magic hands
I'll feel ya, Bessie, and squeeze your teaming glands
I'll milk ya, Bessie, moo at me for your hay
Oh fussy, Bessie don't have a cow I pray,
Oh fussy Bessie, now that I've bound you,
Stay and let me milk you, Bessie, let me milk you.

You're just so cute I'm behooved
That's to say, I'm realy moved
You are the finest of cows
I love to milk you and how
A quick look between your legs
And I'm a-mazed by your kegs


You sound so cute when you moo
Can't keep my hands off of you

I'll milk ya...
Bessie, and with my magic hands,
I'll feel ya Bessie, and squeeze your teaming glands,
I'll milk ya Bessie, moo at me for your hay
Oh fussy.....(Repeat lyrics while fading)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 5   10
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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Bet the farm that you're gonna get fives from us. What you're gonna get from that cow... What we've already gotten from you is TOO MUCH INFORMATION!
Kristof Robertson - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Geez, Lionel...do we really NEED to know about your agricultural shenanigans? Luckily, any sense of revulsion was swept away by tears of laughter. 555
Ann Hammond - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
hay! I liked this
AFW - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
I'm lactose intolerant, but I had to read this anyway... a dairy delight
alvin rhodes - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
tender, as beef should be
Trell Brown - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
!
PMS - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Udderly entertaining
Meriadoc - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Always have a soft spot for beast boffing parodies...
Peregrin - February 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Who Moo ? 3 x 5's !
Stuart McArthur - February 20, 2007 - Report this comment
apparently cowboys have just discovered three new uses for cows: meat, milk, and leather - funny rhymes Lionel -555
Yoidy - February 20, 2007 - Report this comment
Cowabunga 5s!

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