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Song Parodies -> "Conflict of Interest"

Original Song Title:

"Viva Las Vegas"

Original Performer:

Elvis Presley

Parody Song Title:

"Conflict of Interest"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

No, not a song about anyone in the Bush Administration. In fact, it slams a prominent Democrat, George Mitchell! Don't believe a word of it until the former Senator from Maine, part of Red Sox Nation, names some Boston players as well. Mo Vaughn and Eric Gagne don't count.
(instrumental opening)

Bright lights city won the baseball flags.
He will set those flags on fire!
Had a whole lot of money and time he could burn
and gave a report that was dire!
Well, there's seventy-eight players written up there.
Supposedly took steroids like they just didn't care.
But we've got a reason why it might not be fair:

Conflict of interest!
Conflict of interest!

How I wish that there were more
than personal trainer's hearsay!
And even if there were forty more
it wouldn't explain it all away!

Well, there's Clemens, and Pettitte, a dirty deal?
But Schilling's cleared completely, are you for real?
No Boston stars had cheated? We must appeal!

Conflict of interest!
Conflict of interest!

Conflict of interest
'cause George Mitchell is present
on Sox board so he's hesitant
to throw those two crowns down the drain!

Conflict of interest
no Ortiz or Varitek, it
seems no Lowell or Beckett!
Yankee "evidence"
would not hold up in court, my friend!

So go and keep on the run
and say what Yankees have done
it amounts to a very big crime!
But you're morally broke and you should always remember
that the Sox won in very same time!

So go on, George, and give it everything you've got.
Just remember, your seat's getting very hot.
Your credibility's completely shot!

Conflict of interest!
Conflict of interest!
Conflict of interest!
of interest!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   6

User Comments

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Max Power - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
It would've been ironic had Schilling been named considering his stand on steroid issues. 555 names
alvin - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
no current dodgers named either...yaaaaaaay
Max Power - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Seems to me that this song has just attracted 1 troll so far.
John Barry - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Speaking of urine tests: I was at Dulles a few years ago, taking a leak, and standing at the urinal next to me was a U.S. senator. No, not Larry Craig, but George Mitchell himself. 5s, even though I'm a Sox fan.
McKludge - December 15, 2007 - Report this comment
Well, ya know, it could be those current Red Sox you mentioned never have done any performance enhancing drugs, other than painkillers and cortizone shots. Although I would call those two performance *maintaining* drugs.
But you are right, MAJOR conflict of interest to have a sitting member of an baseball team's board conduct the investigation.
John Jenkins - December 16, 2007 - Report this comment
5 points primarily for spoofing a Democrat. You also get kudos for the clever "Varitek it/Beckett" rhyme. Too bad you couldn't squeeze Ramirez in.
MrMacphisto - December 16, 2007 - Report this comment
lol... I love it
Michael Pacholek - December 17, 2007 - Report this comment
Max: The reason I suggested Schilling is not because I don't like him (although, let's face it, he's unlikable), but because he's as much of a Clemens acolyte as Pettitte is. Alvin: Eric Gagne was mentioned, and while I never considered him before, he does fit the profile. John B: I was buying something at the Rite Aid at the Watergate complex in Washington, and the guy behind me... Henry Kissinger would never be caught dead in anything but a sharp suit, but otherwise, this guy looked a LOT like him. Didn't say anything so I didn't hear the accent. John J: I tried to squeeze Manny in, but that stuff in his hair made it awfully hard.

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