Bright guy, witty, I'm a gent with soul.
Have you gents been sold to hire?
Got a whole lot of awards and degrees I've earned
In education, higher.
And I founded Circuit City, invented Nair;
Conversely, started men's club for hair.
Devil's in the details; one I don't share:
Vita is bogus, vita is bogus.

Check out my SAT score:
It's 2400; GPA.
Never slipped below four-point-four.
Just 12 when I got my MBA.
I stay pokerfaced as I deliver my spiel.
I importune this boss with nerves of steel.
One part of my story that I don't reveal:
Vita is bogus, vita is bogus.

Vita is bogus but adeptly fashioned
With the truth cleverly rationed.
Embellishments I've made.
Vita is bogus, churnin' out little white lies,
Turnin' white lies to big lies.
Though I'm not a dunce,
I never made it past third grade.

OK, then, the deal is done?
You will make me number one.
Now that I've been as CEO hired,
I'll call a meeting to tell
Each member of the staff that
Every one's of you's fired.
I'm gonna become a corp'rate despot;
Ladies I know gonna fill each slot
On the payroll as I practice nepot-
ism with bonus, vig** ta my cronies,
Vitae, vitae all bogus.



*curriculum vitae (AKA résumé)
**short for "vigorish," interest paid to a loanshark or bookie (term may be derived from Ukrainian "vygrash" or Russian "vyigrish," winnings, profit)