~
Oh well, I'm the type of gal who can let her hair hang down
Who's six-foot-six in flats and loves to boogy on the town
I'd had enough of kooks-in-caves and hiding out in 'stan
So ditched it all—got sex-changed—and, well, POOF!, now here I am!!
They called me Osama, sir—
Now-- 'Mohamma Myrrh'—
Bin can't be— found — his 'hound' — got ground — more round — to 'mound'!

Well, I'm Gaga for the boys, and I let 'em have their way
And since I'm 're-equipped' down there—it's technic'ly not gay!
Bin Lauden played a bearded brute who ever wore the frown
I've swapped that ZZ-Topster vibe for D-cup strapless gowns
They called me 'Osama', sir—
Now 'Mohamma Myrrh' —
Bin can't be— found — his 'hound' — got ground — to 'mound' — let's pound!

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Well now I 'phat-wa' - in - the- clubs
Where Apple- tinis - are - my - muse
And those damn burkas I now snub
'Cause they hide my brand new-five-inch spike-heeled Jimmy Choos!

I couldn't do Saddamy's 'spider-hole' thing in a well
So now I hang with Lohan n' think: "Infidels are swell!"
I sorta still 'do jihad'—but it's more the girlie type:
I lobbied 'hard' for health care—'twas my Mata Hari strike!
Gone is Osama, sir—
Now I'm 'Mohamma Myrrh'—
Bin can't be— found — his 'hound'— got ground — to 'mound' — let's pound!

~ instru'mental! ~

Well, I'm the kind of gal who now eschews those cleric rants
And traded in her sui' vest for see-thru harem pants
And now my beard's depila'd I ain't lookin' quite so rough
The only veil I need's the Vail I streak thru in the buff
They called me 'Osama', sir—
Now 'Mohamma Myrrh' —
Bin can't be— found — his 'hound' — got ground — to 'mound' — let's pound!

They called me 'Osama', sir—
So Bar Obama, sir—
Bin can't be— found — his 'hound' — got ground — to 'mound — let's pound!

They called me 'Osama', sir—
Up yo mamma, sir—
Bin can't be— found — his 'hound' — got ground — to 'mound' — let's pound!

~