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Song Parodies -> "The Wonderbra"

Original Song Title:

"The Wanderer"

Original Performer:

Dion

Parody Song Title:

"The Wonderbra"

Parody Written by:

Tommy Turtle

The Lyrics

(Some previous parodies show "Dion and the Belmonts". Dion split from the Belmonts in late 1960 and recorded TOS in 1961 with an uncredited backup group, the Del-Satins.)
Oh, well, I'm the type of bra that will never let 'em down
Where little "bits" are, well, I make em' big and round
I lift 'em and I squeeze 'em till they just don't look the same
The guys, how you can tease 'em with a fraud upon your frame
They call me the Wonderbra - yeah, the Wonderbra
I make the flat ones round; a bust abound

Oh yeah, there's gel on my left cup and there's padding on my right
And sexy is the girl, yeah, who's wearing me tonight
And when some guy drools, so totally impressed
He tears open her shirt and finds a phony of a chest
'Cause I'm a Wonderbra - yeah - a Wonderbra
Out of a molehill, make a giant mound

See how I fit beneath your gown
Improve your life with this brassiere
I'll give you cleavage of renown
Built with two underwires by a civil engineer [1]

Oh, I'm the type of bra that gets a beauty crowned
Embroidery of lace; each bust in foam, surround
And when you find a fool fallin' for a broad
Yeah, the odds are better than ten to one, he's victim of a fraud:
She wore a Wonderbra - yeah - a "thunderbra"
It makes an ounce a pound, a change profound
Busted so

Oh yeah, I'll give you a space where men like to be drowned
To bury their whole face - a breath, then go back down
And when you see some sap mooning for his Ma'am
So sickly seeking her succulents; sucker for a scam
Fooled by a Wonderbra, yeah, a Wonderbra
I make your A's astound; I wrap around; the men, confound
'Cause I'm a Wonderbra - yeah - a Wonderbra
But when at last unbound: the puppies downed; point at the ground
No, it's not underwear; it's plunder-wear
'Cause with the straps unwound, support unsound; illusion found; the boys all frowned
But still, it's fun to wear...

(repeat until the formerly magnificent fade away)



[1] Their website actually does make claims of "Precision engineering". But who would want to click on the link and have to sort through a bunch of bra ads just to verify something said in a parody? Well, nobody ever reads these nerdy footnotes anyway. Too bad.


"Wonderbra" ® HanesBrands, Inc. All else © 2007 Tommy Turtle. All rights reserved.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 1
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 1
 
 5   14
 13
 13
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
if i were a bra, i'd wanna sing out too...great concept and execution...dare, i say, uplifting ?
Jonathan S. - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Well, I know the OS, and your parody is well-written, but the subject matter was a little too dirty for me. 534. You could say I see your parody as being like the Wonderbra-wearing women in it...a bit too forward. Nyuk nyuk nyuk.
Jason - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Jonathan, I strongly disagree with you. This wasn't dirty at all. Your comment sounds like you was reading a poomaster parody. Anyway, great effort TT. 555
John Barry - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
I was büsten a gut as a sang along.
MasonR - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Very, um, uplifting.
AFW - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Gets right to the point...good double stretch of hilarity...up front with fives
Ann Hammond - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
I was laughing too.
Tommy Turtle - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
alvin (lol), Jason, John Barry, MasonR, AFW, Ann Hammond, thanks.

Jonathan S., sorry that you were offended, and sorry that the title didn't warn you that it might be offensive.
TJC - September 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Wunderbar Wonder Bra! Masterfully written with TMGLTQ-- highly singable and funny as heck-- best anthropomoundification ever! (and no, I'm not making a mountain out of a mole hill here)... with your latest 'run' of parodies these past six weeks or so, I have new insights into your brilliant comedic abilities. Keep `em coming!
John Jenkins - September 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Excellent wordplay, which might have been overkill since the parody qualified for all 5s just on the basis of the author's research.
Jason - September 19, 2007 - Report this comment
Why is Jonathan S. so horrible at times?!
TT - September 19, 2007 - Report this comment
TJC, thanks... now, there's a new field of study, "anthropomoundification " lol! ... John Jenkins, thanks; rest assured it was a labor of love :) ... Jason, don't think I've met Jonathan before. Everyone to their own opinion, but thanks for the defense.
Red Ant - September 21, 2007 - Report this comment
Don't know how I missed these puppies... great work, and I fully support you (err, her) 555.
Charlie M - September 21, 2007 - Report this comment
Genius, just pure genius
TT - September 21, 2007 - Report this comment
Red Ant, (lol) thanks... Charlie M, thanks.
PMS - September 23, 2007 - Report this comment
Busted out laughing
TT - September 24, 2007 - Report this comment
TT thanks PMS... he is always happy to knocker out with laughs.
Jack Wilson - December 11, 2007 - Report this comment
I was gonna do "A Wonderbra"! F*ck! Ok well, this was still great,5s
TT - September 20, 2008 - Report this comment
Jack Wilson, sorry... Different spins/lyrics/jokes are always welcome... plenty of "room" in this topic, and plenty of reader interest hehe :) thanks for v/c.
Dr Music - September 20, 2008 - Report this comment
And now it's time for Roscoe and Albert's parody review. Roscoe: Good evening i'm Gary Roscoe. Albert: And i'm Colin Alberts. Roscoe: Welcome to our parody review. Today we are reviewing the newest parody by parodist Tommy Turtle. This new parody is titled Wonderbra and it offers a new take on women's fashion. Albert: This parody was well written and funny. I enjoyed it. I give it a ten rating. Roscoe: I loved the lyrics, it was really inventive, it was hillarious- I adored it i'll give it a 10 rating too. Albert: We reccomend that you see this parody. I'll take their word for it- I love it. 555!
TT - September 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Dr Music, Gary Roscoe, and Colin Alberts: Thanks for the 10's, guys! (How did you find the "10" button on the voting box? You guys are *sharp* - much better than those jerks, Siskel and Ebert!) .. seriously, thanks for v/c.
Dr Music - September 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks. Roscoe and Albert also thank you. And another note they're a parody of Siskel and Ebert. Roscoe: Colin is the genius who did that. He's the smart one. Albert: Yeah, i'm the smart one. Gary is the good looking one. Roscoe: Unlike Siskel and Ebert we actually get along. Albert: So we're kind of like best friends. And btw, if you want to know how I found the ten button on the vote box there was a secret code somewhere on this site that had to be decoded in order to unlock the beyond 5 rating part. Roscoe: It was not too difficult for him to do really, all he had to do was solve the secret code ala the Da Vinci Code.
Dr Music - September 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks. Roscoe and Albert also thank you. And another note they're a parody of Siskel and Ebert. Roscoe: Colin is the genius who did that. He's the smart one. Albert: Yeah, i'm the smart one. Gary is the good looking one. Roscoe: Unlike Siskel and Ebert we actually get along. Albert: So we're kind of like best friends. And btw, if you want to know how I found the ten button on the vote box there was a secret code somewhere on this site that had to be decoded in order to unlock the beyond 5 rating part. Roscoe: It was not too difficult for him to do really, all he had to do was solve the secret code ala the Da Vinci Code.

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