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Song Parodies -> "You Can't Hurry Dumps"

Original Song Title:

"You Can't Hurry Love"

Original Performer:

Diana Ross And The Supremes

Parody Song Title:

"You Can't Hurry Dumps"

Parody Written by:

Malcolm Higgins

The Lyrics

I need ex lax,
for ease this time
and to take time time to dump myself,
and my doctor said

you can't hurry dumps, no you'll just have to wait,
turds don't come easy, castor oil can lubricate
you can't hurry dumps, and then you will do great
trust in your colon, no mater how long it takes


how many fartbreaks must I stand
before I let this go,
into this thing
right now, my poor wee ring
is barely hangin on,
I'm squeezin hard,
and it's almost gone,
I remember the doctor said

you can't hurry dumps, no you'll just have to wait,
turds don't come easy, castor oil can lubricate
you can't hurry dumps, and then you will do great
trust in your colon, no mater how long it takes

no, I can't bear to spend my life on thrones
constipation now, this feels like a bone
and when I feel that I, I just can't go on
this big dry turd just keeps hangin on
I remember my mama said

you can't hurry dumps, no you'll just have to wait,
turds don't come easy, castor oil can lubricate
you can't hurry dumps, and then you will do great
trust in your colon, no mater how long it takes

no no dumps dumps, don't come easy
but I keep on waiting
anticipating for that soft one
to come out tonight
for brown hershey bars
to come out at night
I keep waiting
I keep on waiting
but it aint easy
it aint easy
my mama said

you can't hurry dumps, no you'll just have to wait,
turds don't come easy, castor oil can lubricate
you can't hurry dumps, and then you will do great
trust in your colon, no mater how long it takes

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