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Song Parodies -> "Owens Didn't Win"

Original Song Title:

"Blowin' In the Wind"

Original Performer:

Bob Dylan

Parody Song Title:

"Owens Didn't Win"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

I was at the Philadelphia Eagles-Dallas Cowboys game on Sunday, the Donovan McNabb vs. Terrell Owens "Grudge Bowl." The surprising thing is not that McNabb played so well and Owens didn't. The surprising thing is that Owens was a non-factor, and the Cowboys still played well enough that the Eagles didn't wrap up the victory until the last 30 seconds of regulation. T.O. wasn't just bad, he was irrelevant. THAT hits him where it really hurts.
How many pills must a man gulp down
before they call ambulance?
How many sit-ups must one man do
in driveway in only short pants?
How many insults can one man send out
to those Philadelphia fans?

The answer, who cares?
'Cause Owens didn't win.
The answer, hey, Owens didn't win.

How many dollars can one man demand
before his team has had enough?
How many teammates can he disrespect
before they'll take no more of his guff?
How many times can a fan shake his head
and hope this guy gets knocked on his duff?

The answer, who cares?
'Cause Owens didn't win.
The answer, hey, Owens didn't win.

How many times can the fans look up
as fireworks shoot toward the sky?
How many ears can one fan have
and hear T.O.'s ESPN lies?
How many stunts will it take 'til he knows
that too many brain cells are fried?

The answer, who cares?
'Cause Owens didn't win.
The answer, hey, Owens didn't win.

The answer, hey, Owens didn't win.
"I went to the fights the other night, and a hockey game broke out." -- Rodney Dangerfield. I went to a soap opera the other day, and a football game broke out. A fantastic football game. And the right team won, and the wrong team can hold its head high for coming close to winning without appeasing their superstar crybaby. How long before coach Bill Parcells tells owner Jerry Jones, "I don't need this job. I can take another one or retire. If you want me, dump him. Either he goes or I go"?

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.8
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   3

User Comments

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alvin rhodes - October 10, 2006 - Report this comment
parody's a winner though
Linda - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
I kind of care because Philadelphia Eagles are my favorite pro team and since I am from CA and T.O. “blessed” both the Eagles and SF teams " I sort of want to gloat for at least a full week. Maybe Sunday I won’t care.
malcolm higgins - October 14, 2006 - Report this comment
five bad stadium hot dogs for myou on each count

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