Song Parodies -> "The Salad of John and Yoko"

Original Song Title:

"The Ballad of John and Yoko"

Original Performer:

"The Salad of John and Yoko"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Since I mocked all the Beatle' songs several years ago, I thought I'd add them to the HUGE number that's already here. Maybe there's a few that haven't been done yet

Standing in the line at the Sizzler
Trying to get something to eat
The man with the tray said
There's no meat today
The butcher's van broke down in the heat

Cripes you know I'm so hungry
I'm just so starved as can be
The way I am feeling
I'm gonna chew on a tree

Finally got my plate to the counter
Looking at the bowls of romaine
The carrots seemed gray
But the beets looked okay
And I viewed the celery with disdain

Cripes...

Sat down just as the lettuce was wilting
The lemon pepper caused me to sneeze
Then I started to blanch
For the dressing was ranch
I could have sworn I ordered bleu cheese

Cripes..

Someone's trying to make me vegetarian
The days I don't eat meat are quite a rarity
Last night I almost
Ate a whole pot roast
There's nothing like a good steak with a roll...

Made a lightning trip to the bathroom
Gnawing jerky beef from a bag
Got back to the table
And found myself able
To woof down all my greens and not gag

Cripes...

http://home.earthlink.net/~duncanoff/

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Guy - October 19, 2003 - Report this comment

What a hoot! This is so true about a lot of buffet style eateries at least with the entrees and salads. Loved it.

Phil Alexander - October 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Sorry, just one bit I don't believe:
And found myself able
To woof down all my greens and not gag
;-)

GRAMMAR COP - October 20, 2003 - Report this comment

"WOOF" DOWN YOUR GREENS??? The correct terminology is to "wolf" them down. (Don't believe me? Check the dictionary!)

Rick D - October 20, 2003 - Report this comment

Hey Grammer Cop! I considered it. But I thought woof was funnier, like a sound you say when you smell something bad. I promise that future parodies will have you howling at the moon as you correct my grammer and Englitch.

Mari D - October 24, 2003 - Report this comment

Note to Grammar Cop: I tried to persuade Rick to change "woof" a long time ago with the same result, so I appreciate your effort! He probably spelled "grammar" wrong on purpose, too! In spite of this, "Salad" is still one of my favorite Rick parodies!

Michael Pacholek - November 18, 2003 - Report this comment

There's no need for dressing here: Tastes great!

Johnny D - June 26, 2005 - Report this comment

Sweet. And leafy.

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