Have you heard short-fingered Pig D.’s
predatory dirt?
He appalls, short-fingered Pig D.,
every word he blurts.
Always spewing dirt,
yet crazed surround him.

Have you heard short-fingered Pig D.
brag he chased a “skirt”
while his latest wife was pregnant,
starting to show girth.
With this pig we’re cursed—
his brays astounding.

In his sty, with lots of backing;
they don’t care he’s a sexist clown.
In his eyes, girls good for shacking
up with, and then send them packing!

For today we’re seeing Pig D.
with Number 3 wife.
Number 4 will be a “winner”;
with nuptials he’s rife.
Each a short shelf life
and then forsaken.

[Fade on protracted sniffing/snorting sound]