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Song Parodies -> "A Slay with a Knife"

Original Song Title:

"A Day in the Life"

Original Performer:

Beatles

Parody Song Title:

"A Slay with a Knife"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

I’m in the news again, oh boy!
Such an unlucky man. . .they found the blade.
Although the news really ain’t bad.
’cause of my Vegas gaffe
I’m in the slam at last.

They couldn’t find me at the bar
guilty of homicide done while deranged.
Then crowds of people’d looked and blared. . .
behind that Bronco door
I had briefly been secured
before they hauled me off to court.

There is a film today, oh boy!
A series, really, that tries to explore
how I got away with that flay.
So many people look;
it’s based on a book.
I love to prune gourds off.

Coked up, cut off the heads—
corpses really, really bled.
There was so much, it could fill four cups.
I had f**ked up; in balance hung my fate.
Found the throat and slashed at that.
Made it gush; the glove got splat.
Ran away to where there was more coke
a synapse poke, and I went into a scheme.

Hmmmmmmm?

I shed the hew-to-flay-throat toy,
stored in a hole until my mansion’s sheared.
Out from the hole the blade then falls.
Bigger news than lout pols:
several trolls are worse aholes than even I who filled two palls.
Vile schmucks sure turn me off!

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - March 09, 2016 - Report this comment
Hmm... Nice... Uh, knife themes today! 555 for both! Bloody good!
callmelennie - March 09, 2016 - Report this comment
I always suspected that "A Day in The Life" was John Lennon's homage to OJ's jumior year at Southern Cal
Patrick - March 09, 2016 - Report this comment
How could you tell anything from a knife that has been buried for over 20 years? I think some workman on the demolition site just planted the thing as a joke. According to what I read at the time, O.J. had just purchased a big lockblade stiletto with fake stag grips. A couple knife dealers promoted that later in their catalogs. But he also had just finished shooting a film about a Navy SEAL, in which he carried a military style diver's knife that always thought was more likely to be able to inflict the kinds of wounds found on Goldman and Brown. Those big flashy stilettos are mostly for show.
Callmelennie - March 10, 2016 - Report this comment
But a knife like that would explain the catastrophic throat wound inflicted on Nicole Simpson and the wounds on Ronald Goldman. Clearly, these two were attacked by a highly effective stabbing and slashing instrument ...... I think the case shows that Simpson had thought thru some of the aspects of concealing his role in the crime, like wearing gloves to avoid fingerprints, hiding incriminating evidence. But I guess he didnt realize how much blood is spilt when a carotid artery is severed, and that it comes out so fast, you wont be able to avoid leaving a footprint in the blood. Once it was established in a second trial that Simpson owned one of only 300 size 12 Bruno Magli shoes ever sold in America, all reasonable doubt evaporated
Rob Arndt - March 10, 2016 - Report this comment
OK, time to step into the discussion. 1) the murder weapon has never been found and probably won't be found, 2) O.J. had two solid knives he owned that don't match the wounds of NBS and RG. One was a 15" blade bought from Ross Cutlery in LA. In pristine condition, never used. Another was a 4" folder. Heavy enough and with a straight blade which could enable it to cause _some_ wounds like Nicole's neck wound of 2.5" X 5.25" penetrate and slash, but not Goldman's wounds which have suggested a serrated blade... which leads to 3) Many LAPD and knife specialists believe O J. used two knives, one with a straight blade and another with serrated. They believe his military training for movie "Frogman" possibly helped him committ the dual homicides. 4) The retired LAPD officer "trophy" claim has come up before. It is a dead end IMO. Knives are pretty easy to clean up soaked in ammonia and can be taken apart making many small pieces that can be dispersed easily or disposed of.

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