Vanna Marie White is adorable
The cutest one that you would never disrespect
She stands ten feet tall, turns letters
And she has a sharp-tooth mouth on the back of her neck

She never eats anything
But excretes some diamonds every day
She could throw you out the sixteenth floor
But you still would love her anyway
Yeah, you'd want to kiss her anyway

Vanna Marie White won on Jeopardy
And she had lost true Daily Doubles twice
She trained a jellyfish to do her shopping
And it would make haters pay the price

She could rip out your viscera
And show them to you right before you died
Every day, she'd make the host (Pat Sajak)
Give her a piggyback ride
Yeah, eight-hour piggyback ride
Giddyup, Pat!

Puzzle warrior, master of the skies
She could zap you dead with her lightning-bolt eyes
Oh yeah
Oh yeah
She had her very own line almost everywhere
She once tugged and pulled hard on Weird Al's hair
Oh yeah
Oh yeah, and it wasn't unfair, I tell ya

Vanna Marie White sold her eyelash clippings
As a weapon to kill Pat Sajak
She ran a two-minute mile blindfolded
With her puzzleboard strapped to her back

She could eat more baked lasagna
Than any other one I know
Once she fell off into re-entry
And she didn't even stub her toe
Didn't even break the nail of her toe, didn't even hurt

Vanna Marie White figured out cold fusion
And she only told Hoda Kotb
I've seen her right unhinge her jaw
And swallow a golden Humvee

She'd bash your face into a puzzle
If you didn't treat her very right
'Cause you can bet all your cash or spin when you know the solve
But we know you just don't mess around with Vanna White
No no no
Talkin' 'bout Vanna White