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Song Parodies -> "Please Don't Ever Go Out With Taylor"

Original Song Title:

"We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together"

Original Performer:

Taylor Swift

Parody Song Title:

"Please Don't Ever Go Out With Taylor"

Parody Written by:

Abbott Skelding

The Lyrics

I'm not afraid to admit it, I am a fan of the OS and I do think Miss Swift is pretty...however, she does have a tendency to go all-in with relationships, and the results usually end up on her next album. Thats what this spoof is about. Original Song:
I went out with this girl just once, she seemed nice
Had curly blonde hair, I liked her laugh, nice eyes
We’ve only been together a few months
Then I said we need a break (“What!?”)
I haven’t seen her since that fateful day, then she
Shows up on MTV with song to play, ‘bout me
And then she says I’m really gonna pay, she says-
“I hate you, we broke up, I’m sorry, still love you”

Oooh I wish I could have seen the signs
But oooh, hey guys- I'm warning you, I'm warning you

Please don’t ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!
Please don’t ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!
Break her heart, she’ll write a song
Gets played on MTV
So please don’t ever ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!

Yes, never...

I heard she went to Starbucks Wednesday night, and she
Flashed a smile to server guy named Mike, but he
Did not see it, “No connection? Why!?”, It’s on
her new record, that story is track nine

Oooh, she looks real cute, but she’s not right
But oooh, hey guys- I’m warning you, I'm warning you

Please don’t ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!
Please don’t ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!
Don’t break up, or you’ll end up
On Billboard, number three!
So please don’t ever ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!

Speed dating, great! Now she will find a good suitor
New album in May, June and September!

[Pizza Delivery Guy]
“Ok, one pepperoni pizza will be $7.50, Miss Swift”

“Oh my God, don’t you feel this connection? Butterflies in my stomach,
I think this is love, will you mar…hey, where are you going? (Noooo!)”

Please, you better, better, better, stay away from Taylor!
Please, don’t ever, ever, ever, for God’s sake- don’t date her!
If you must, don’t lose her trust
You’ll hear it constantly!
So please, don’t ever ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!

Please! Oooh, oooh, please don’t date Taylor, ple-ease!
Oh, you will feel much better!

You should walk, she’ll start to talk
‘Bout weddings on date three!
So please, don’t ever ever ever ever, don’t go out with Taylor!
NOTE: The spoken word section above is not meant to be a direct spoof of the one in the OS (with pacing and whatnot), but that bit of dialogue would happen in the same spot in the song. Got it? Good.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   3
 5   11

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Abbott Skelding - September 28, 2012 - Report this comment
Official Recording:
Jeff Reuben - October 04, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm surprised you didn't get more comments on this, I thought it was well done and clever.
Chris Bodily TM - October 15, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) At first, I was gonna say the pacing was 100% perfect, then I realized the YouTube video was the parody recording. :x I got a good chuckle of out this one.Love the pizza guy part, lol. 555
Blaydeman - October 20, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) I love the OS, although Tay Swift annoys me sometimes. I love the topic of this parody because it's so true. All of Swift's best hits are her bad mouthing her exes. Great work on this one. Super funny!
Arwen - October 29, 2012 - Report this comment
SOTM...favorite so far! I find myself loving TS songs for about a week, and then breaking up with them after overplay on the radio. Don't tell her, though...I don't need her to immortalize my wandering eye... ; )
Patrick - October 30, 2012 - Report this comment
Bad relationships can make for some good songs. I started listening to a new music station a couple weeks ago, now I hear this one every time I get in the car.
bobpiecheese - October 30, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) So basically, Taylor Swift and bad relationship songs are like Ke$ha and getting-completely-plastered songs? Gotcha. Brilliant parody here, no doubt about it. 555!
Matthias - November 02, 2012 - Report this comment
I don't know... I think I would still go out with her even though I know our relationship would go up in flames just because she's so damn hot. It would be better than going out with Adele because then everybody would be crying because of our break-up.
Arwen - February 26, 2013 - Report this comment
SOTY...I think Taylor has had like 7 boyfriends since I enjoyed this last...still so timely. Love it!
bobpiecheese - September 19, 2017 - Report this comment
(Artistry) See above!
Max Power - September 19, 2017 - Report this comment
She can have a reverse harem and would still blew it.

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