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Song Parodies -> "Steep Hills"

Original Song Title:

"Cheap Thrills"

Original Performer:

Sia ft. Sean Paul

Parody Song Title:

"Steep Hills"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "Into Pieces" self-challenge. Man the First: "Say, I don't quite understand the appeal of rock climbing, oh well, not my bag" Man the Second "WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT!!1"
Up the cliff, hu-urts
Rocky cliff, hu-urts (higher)
Roll with it, hu-urts, wanna stop-stop
Up this cliff, hu-urts
Rocky cliff, hu-urts
Roll with it, hurts, wanna stop-stop

Oh Go-od, oh Go-od, lost my grip with that rock
I'm high, too high off the grou-ound, feels wrong
Why'd I take your da-are? Should be no rea-eal shock
But I can't lie, don't feel I-I belong
Up high, where's the damn floor (wanna stop)?
Give me my floor (wanna stop)
I-I'm a la-azy geek
Each step, hear a crack, think I might crack
Let me desce-end down, please (can't ta-ake more, plea-ease)

Buddy, I-I-I don't share all your thrills, I ha-ate climbin' high
I hate steep hills
Buddy, I-I-I won't gain your same thrills just by-y climbin' high
I hate steep hills
Cause my hands are real twi-i-i-i-i-itchy-y (ev'ry other second, I'll lose hold)
The handholds lack consi-iste-ency-y (wish I had total control)
Know that may sound pi-i-i-i-i-icky-y (not an indoor gym with a fake wall)
On this cliff, I hate ha-a-a-a-a-angi-in' (this is my hell, can't Spider-Man crawl)

Oh Go-od, oh Go-od, won't you let me have gloves?
Hands are in pain, feelin' li-ike a schmu-uck
Grip's gone down the drai-ain cause the sweat, i-it runs
It's pretty lame, shoes are i-in your truck
No lie, you're an asshole (wanna stop)
Total asshole (wanna stop)
Sto-op laughi-in' at me (you prick)
If I fall down and my head goes crack
Best foot my bi-ill, buddy (tryna-a kill me-e)

Buddy, I-I-I'll gain none of your thrills just by-y climbin' high
I hate steep hills
Buddy, I-I-I hate this kind of thrill, don't li-ike climbin' high
I hate steep hills
My hands are really swea-ea-ea-ea-ea-eaty-y (gettin' really hard to keep my hold)
And you gave no rope to-o ho-old me-e (on this climbin' thing, not sold)
It seems really pe-e-e-e-e-etty-y (just because I think you're hobby's balls)
Looks like you're tryna ki-i-i-i-i-ill me-e (it's like you want my dumb ass to fall)

You're a huge je-erk, look at me-e
Halfway up a cliff because you saw my string of tweets, got cross (I hate steep hills)
Was no insu-ult in those twee-eets (woo!)
Just expressed confusion at those who climb up peaks, jerk (I hate steep hills)
Geez, I wish I'd never broached that topic
Cause you went and called my "bluff", forced me to climb this peak, jerk (I hate steep hills)
Asshole (asshole), I'm not really followin' your logic
It makes my poor brain hurt, let me come back to Earth (I hate steep hills)
What do you want fro-o-o-o-o-om me-e (on this climbin' schtick, I'm still not sold)?
You know I won't achie-ieve thi-is fea-eat (holdin' that gun's kinda cold)
Take this burden o-o-o-o-o-off me-e (before the inevitable fall)
These risks, I don't like cha-a-a-a-a-ancin', oh, oh (think your methods are way off the wall)
Oh-oh-oh

Buddy, I-I-I'm sure I hate these thrills gained by-y climbin' high
I hate steep hills (oh)
Buddy, I-I-I (oh-oh-oh) loathe what you call "thrills", sure ha-ate climbin' high
I hate steep hills
Sure, so far I'm just fou-ou-ou-ou-ou-our fee-eet (not a great achievement, truth be told)
Off the ground, but I fee-eel so-o wea-eak (only twenty five, not old)
Can't scale any mo-o-o-o-o-ore, plea-ease (but I won't concede my point at all)
Right out, I'll soon be pa-a-a-a-a-assi-in' (you've just made your side look mad as balls)

La, la, la, la-a, la-a, la-a, la (I hate steep hills)
La, la, la, la-a, la-a, la-a (can't stand steep hills)
La, la, la, la-a, la-a, la-a (I loathe steep hills)
La, la, la, la, la-a, la-a (don't like steep hills)

Fun fact: "Cheap Thrills" contains my own review of the song within the lyrics. Convenient!

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