Quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, quirk
Your characters have quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, quirks
Normally, that could work, wo-ork, work, wo-ork, work, work
But all they have is quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, quirks
Like that one's a jerk, je-erk, jerk, je-erk, jerk, jerk
And that one's pretty stern, ste-ern, stern, ste-ern, stern, geez

None of them develop
Veer from their one trait se-eldom
It makes your series seem real li-ifeless
A little depth will more than spi-ice it
But it seems all that you're rely-yin'
On is real cliché plot devi-ices
Not to disparage all of your creations
Sure it took lots of hard work and frustration
But if you don't show a little innovation
And break formula, you-ou're gonna end up in stagnation
All that I'm wa-antin' from you i-is to give me
Somethin' slightly-y diff'rent, man
Characters tha-at live and breathe
Characters tha-at change with ease
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm
But you insist that you've done nothin' wrong

All they need is a quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, quirk
One single, little quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, quirk
Run it into the dirt, di-irt, dirt, di-irt, dirt, dirt
Because people love quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, quirks
Work, wo-ork, work, wo-ork, work, work
That's what shows need, jerk, je-erk, jerk, je-erk, jerk, jerk
Not hack writin', real work, wo-ork, work, wo-ork, work, work

Ev'ry ep i-is cheese
I cannot be-elieve (ooh-ooh-ooh)
You just confirmed a season three-ee-ee, uh-huh-uh-uh-uh (ooh-ooh-ooh)
When the plot's yet to advance, dude
No-one's dropped any drama bombs, it's true (ooh-ooh)
Status quo is god, but what else will convince you (ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh)
That this ain't how cartoons work, dude (ooh-ooh)?
The lack of awards for you (ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh)?
Got no accolades, it's true (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Your show's oka-ay
It's not awful, o-only just passé

Cause ev'ry quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, quirk
Each stupid, friggin' quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, quirk
Gets on all of my nerves, ne-erves, nerves, ne-erves, nerves, nerves
Exaggerated quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, quirks
And a total dearth, dea-earth, dearth, dea-earth, dearth, dearth
Of anybody learn, lea-earn, learn, lea-earn, learnin' (yeah, okay)

Your show may seem fun, fun, fu-un, fun with quirks a-all over
But I just see mad commotion
That will stay real long with no-one
The second or third view (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
The same as the first one, in then out the brain, it's true
Ephemeral shit to be slightly crude
If I want good entertainment, I won't seek you
Cause I kno-ow i-it seems to be fun, fun, fu-un, fun, still lame a-all ove-er
Not even the style that's tre-endy
Toons these days have plot packed densely, oh-oh-oh, yeah
Cause there's Steven Universe to be wa-atchin'
Knowin', knowin', knowin', knowin', knowin'
That you must wing a-all your scripts, it's sho-owin'
Ev'ry ep's the same, insa-ane
Take the characters, switch their place
And never change their traits
Though it makes no damn sense

A huge mismatch of quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, qui-uirks, quirks, quirks
That one dude is the jerk, je-erk, jerk, je-erk, jerk, jerk
So why's he doin' work, wo-ork, work, wo-ork, work, work
To save the precious earth, ea-earth, earth, ea-earth, earth, earth?
It's not depth, you jerk, je-erk, jerk, je-erk, jerk, jerk
Says "I don't care", ain't work, wo-ork, work, wo-ork, workin'

Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm
Quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, qui-uirk, quirk, quirk
Mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm