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Song Parodies -> "Stealin' Kills"

Original Song Title:

"Feel It Still"

Original Performer:

Portugal. The Man

Parody Song Title:

"Stealin' Kills"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Part of my "How We Do It" self-challenge. Where's the fun in playing a shoot-'em-up when your teammates refuse to let you shoot 'em up?
All of these games on my shelf
None contain co-op, cause that's my own kind of hell
Thought the point of them was "work as a team"
But no-one I know got that deal

Ooh-ooh-ooh, cause I never get to hit now (hey)
Always stealin' shivs, I thought that I'd called dibs now (hey)
Ev'ry game, I've found, they'd be stealin' kills
Ooh-ooh-ooh, will I ever shoot these shits now (hey)?
Nope, they're stealin' it, guess that's one more rage quit now (hey)
Gonna stop right now cause they're stealin' kills

Thought my actions on the screen
Made it clear I wanna kill 'em, shove this sword up their rectum
Gear should belong to me
Do you understand how I feel?

Ooh-ooh-ooh, I don't get the final hit now (hey)
When they steal that shit, I always flip my lid now (hey)
All I say is filth cause they're stealin' kills
Ooh-ooh-ooh, my experience is nil now (hey)
Cause they steal what hits would make it overtick now (hey)
Overleveled now cause they're stillin' kills

The best player? No siree
Ooh-ooh-ooh, sure, I never get a hit now
It can't be coincidental that the last hit ain't from me
In ev'ry single instance, please
I've never made a killin' blow, feel down (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Ooh-ooh-ooh, made me give up playin' it now
I'm sure some folks would quibble, I'm a scrub, I'm too fickle
Oh, when it befalls them, do they freak
Tried to gun 'em, but they gunned 'em
Tried to bomb 'em, but they bombed 'em
Tried to cut 'em, but they cut 'em, hacks

Ooh-ooh-ooh, now I'll never replay this, yeah
Sold ev'ry FPS, not to just pay my bills now
Sick of all these clowns out there stealin' kills
Ooh-ooh-ooh, major breach of game ethics now (hey)
Just like stealin' loot and screamin' epithets now (hey)
Thrown controllers down at them stealin' kills
Ooh-ooh-ooh, it's not just me bein' shit now (hey)
I dealt ninety-nine percent of the damage now (hey)
But the final round was them stealin' kills
Yes, I'm bitter still thanks to stealin' kills (hey)

If you're not audibly adding a gap after the first word in "Portugal. The Man", you're not pronouncing it right as far as I'm concerned.

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Pacing: 5.0
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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

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