-> "Andrew Jackson vs. Winston Churchill"
Original Song Title:
"Epic Rap Battles of History"
Parody Song Title:
"Andrew Jackson vs. Winston Churchill"
The Lyrics
Epic Rap Battles of History!
Winston Churchill!
vs....
Andrew Jackson!
Begin!
(Churchill)
I bring you greetings
from Blenheim Palace.
I'm about to show you
some imperial malice.
Like my Royal Air Force
I'm going to spit fire.
Don't judge me by my height:
Short Brits defend their shire!
I left the Cabinet
to join the boys in the trench
but even the Great War
doesn't match your stench.
You wasted your time
defending Peggy Eaton.
Like the Luftwaffe
you're going to get a beatin'.
(Jackson)
Is that the best y'all can do?
That's not your finest hour.
Don't tell me about smells, dawg:
You need a f***in' shower!
When I'm through with you
you'll need warm English beers.
You can keep sweat and toil:
I'm gonna bring your blood and tears!
You can't touch me
you fat little poof!
I got the record to prove
that I'm f***in' bulletproof!
I'll fight you anywhere
and you should surrender
and then go off with Tony Eden
for an epic bender!
(Churchill)
I will fight you on the beaches
in the fields, streets and hills.
Like a national bank
I'm going to give you chills.
Did you ever read a book?
I've written plenty.
And you just got your ugly face taken
off of the twenty!
I bitch-slapped Hitler.
You massacred Indians.
Your actions are disgraceful:
There's just no defendin' 'em!
Go back to your Hermitage.
I've beaten you.
Never has so much wack
been whacked by so few.
(Jackson)
Who are you to talk about
killing Indians?
You set the stage for the deaths
of millions of Muslims and Hinduans!
I conquered Florida
and beat your kind at N'Awlins
while your bungle at Gallipoli
was truly appallin'!
I never lost an election
'cept the one that was stolen.
You got the Order of the Boot
in the first postwar pollin'!
I've beaten ya so bad
it's really disturbin'!
So put down that cigar
and enjoy some Tennessee bourbon!
Who won?
Who's next?
You decide!
Epic...
Yee... haw!
Rap Battles of History!
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 2.2 | |
How Funny: | 2.2 | |
Overall Rating: | 2.2 | |
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Total Votes: | 34 |
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Voting Breakdown
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| 3 | | 1 | |
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