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Song Parodies -> "Mickey Mantle vs. Mickey Mouse"

Original Song Title:

"Epic Rap Battles of History"

Original Performer:

Nice Peter & Epic Lloyd

Parody Song Title:

"Mickey Mantle vs. Mickey Mouse"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

They don't have much in common, other than their name, and that they were both on TV a lot in the 1950s and '60s. But they're both legends. Who will win? I guess it depends on whether or not you're a Yankee Fan. (Remember: ERB uses profanity, so I'll use asterisks to censor the naughty words.)
Epic Rap Battles of History!

Mickey Mantle!


Mickey Mouse!


Ha ha! So here I am
the Great MC Mouse
battling a Yankee
who's probably soused!
You're as crazy as Donald
and like Goofy, you're dumb.
I'm gonna knock you back
to your South Bronx slum!
Uncle Walt tells me
that you're a switch-hitter.
Does that mean someone's bat
has gone right up your s****er?
All those Baby Boom boys
you aim to please?
No wonder you've got such
troubles with your knees!

Y'all just an ol' rodent
and I'm gettin' the Raid.
A Most Valuable Playa
and you're gonna get played.
I'll tear the cover off yer hide
and knock ya over the wall.
'Cause ever since "Fantasia"
your career has stalled.
All that Florida sun
has left ya actin' loopy.
And your mouse wife Minnie?
I hear she's f***ing Goofy!
Maybe that's why Donald Duck
don't wear no pants.
You rappin' against The Mick?
Mouse, you didn't have a chance.

Well, I'm the Sorcerer's Apprentice.
I get the heavens thundered.
You think you're Number 7?
Yeah, on a scale of 100!
You think you can beat me?
You're both drunk and crazy.
You're striking out here
like the Mighty Casey!
Why don't you throw down your script
and walk right off the stage
and get drunk with Billy Martin
and troll some girls that's underage?
The whole world knows me
not you, so kiss my crotch
and then crawl back into
your bottle of cheap Scotch!

Ah cain't hear ya, with these World Series
rings in my ears.
By the time I was a rookie
you'd been washed up for years.
You're real lousy actor
and you ain't that funny.
In "Roger Rabbit," you got outshined
by ol' Bugs Bunny.
I sold out stadiums.
How about you?
If you wore Number 7
it would match yer I.Q.
I left you and yer Club
lookin' like a big mess.
I kicked your A-S-S!

Who won?
Who's next?
You decide!


Da da da DAT da da!

Rap Battles of History!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.2
How Funny: 3.2
Overall Rating: 3.2

Total Votes: 15

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   6
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   8

User Comments

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Patrick - November 13, 2014 - Report this comment
A difficult lyric form for someone of my pigmentation. You have hit a home run with this rendition. "7 on a scale of 100" and the comeback "7 matches your IQ". Great balance. The line about Minnie "f--ing Goofy" is a classic, but where else are you ever going to find such a good place to use it? I don't need to know the original to be able to figure out the melodic line here.
Claude Prez - November 13, 2014 - Report this comment
Great stuff
Matthias - November 13, 2014 - Report this comment
You should do Mike Meyers (Austin Powers, Shrek, Etc) VS Michael Myers (Halloween) next! These are great! Keep 'em coming! :-)
Patrick - November 16, 2014 - Report this comment
Warren Buffet vs Jimmy Buffet? Dalai Lama vs Dolly Parton?

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