Yeah
We're all gathered here

Goodbye to Jimmy, a death so grisly
Would bring one to fury if one took a look-see
Don't do it, that's crazy, no need to be pushy
Trust what I'm sayin', it would just get gooey
Leave the casket alone, that's how it should be
That's why it's wrapped up, you could call me a bully
But save your tears for the courts and the jury
Not my fault, don't blame me for goin' all chain-y
Wanna call "bullshit"? You gotta refrain, see
If you had a look then you would go all hazy
Wasn't the doctor or coroner, lady
Nor the guy who found him flung from his Mercedes
Right into the stobie pole, maybe I'm crazy
But one shouldn't drive when you're naked and shaky
From all the liquor, you'll meet your end plainly
The details I shouted don't incriminate me
I simply read the news report, don't hate me
And you interrupted, it's your fault, don't blame me

We all met here to grieve
Fancy black clothes, so dark, geez
Could you shut up? So rude to me
I'm tryna help Frank here rest in peace

What's with the glances? Oh wait, his name's Jimmy, shoot
My seventh funeral this week, true
Lots of folks cryin' and bitchin' 'bout what I do
They were closed-casket too, they were also rude
Just cause I knew exactly how their friends met their doom
True that I knew none of those folks before, same goes for you
I'm a professional-ass eulogiser, I do
Research, don't wanna look like I've got no clue
If you think they're hints that I killed 'em, ain't true
How could I have rigged a car to crash to kill your friend Stu?
I can't believe it, that insult is crazy
These grease stains on my hands are proof that I'm lazy
And all of these wrenches? My other job placement
You're simply hysterical, grieve for poor Jason
Or Steven or Bernard, whatever their name is
"Wah, wah, wah, this guy is heinous"

We all met here to grieve
Dressed up in clothes quite dark, geez
Called up my butt, I charged a fee
I'm tryna help Hank here rest in piece
This is my job, you're stuck, I'm afraid
I've already won here, in advance, you paid
We all met here to grieve
No cheap-ass clothes, so dark, geez
Can't sue my butt, you paid the fee
So I can help Zack here rest in peace
Wait, was it Bob? Shit, mighta been Jane
Either way, it sucks to be them in their grave

I'm not on trial here, no, not on trial here, I'm not on trial here