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Song Parodies -> "I Can't Counter, Dude"

Original Song Title:

"Diet Mountain Dew"

Original Performer:

Lana Del Rey

Parody Song Title:

"I Can't Counter, Dude"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

There are many types of moves in fighting games. Punch the dude, kick the dude, turn off the TV when you're losing, lots of moves. Some of them have a higher learning curve than others, though...
Wanna play with me?
Want a challenge? Then skip me
Can attack with speed
Can hold onto blocks, true, can block

I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
Fingers on the triggers can't move quickly
On my own, I still have fun, however
Multiplayer's where I suck
I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
Just can't work it out, my skill's too shitty
And you'd want to beat up someone clever
Not someone who's a big dunce

Anything I do, you outclass it
It won't bring our spirits high
For me to just constantly get my ass kicked
And for you to coast on by
So it doesn't matter what my class is
The brick wall, the weak but lithe
You're just gonna teach me what outclassed is
And that's not a real fun time

I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
Simple-ish manoeuvre, so you tell me
But I just can't pull it off, no, never
Somethin' 'bout my timin's wrong
I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
Do I hit it now? Later? Shit, killed me
Times I hit you with a punch: straight never
You can flip mine back a ton

Know you're not a big, smug asshole
Happy to take the time
To teach me, nice gesture, that's all
Just won't work, that's right
I'm somethin' of an anti-boaster
I can't react in time
Whether my speed's too fast or slower
I can never get it right

I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
Joysticks in positions contradict'ry
How can you do that with thumbs and fingers
That add up to ten? It's nuts
I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
HP will run out, not slow and drippy
But more like an epic flood, I'll never
Get my head around this stuff

You're too good for me
Buddy, way too good for me
Play too good for me
That's not what you want, dude, I'll wrong you
Might be good at speed
Sure, I'm kinda good with speed
Farely good, but see
You'll turn it back, reshoot my own moves

I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
It's my weakness, can exploit it simply
And 'cause shields can't be held up forever
Won't be long until I'm done
Play for practice? No, I just can't do it
Wouldn't be right, would make you useless
My badness would rub right off, I'm bettin'
That's not somethin' that you'd want
I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky
I don't want your help, your tips or pity
"Play somethin' non-beat-'em-up, you're better
At kart racers"? Stop that stuff
I can't counter, dude, it's too friggin' tricky (you're too good for me)
Try all that you want, you'll never lift me (simply way too good for me)
From these dumps in which I'm always livin' (just too good for me)
Never gonna leave at all (no way I can punch you, can't punch)

You're too good for me
Buddy, way too good for me
Play too good for me
Other reasons? Not true, it's not
You're too good for me
Simply way too good for me
Just too good for me
Just a coward? Not true, it's not
You're too good for me
Buddy, way too good for me
Play too good for me
Reverse psych? It's not true, it's not

This is almost me, except that I just don't use the moves I can't get the timing right for. That way I can put my practice into getting the timing right on Dedede's side smash so my brother can't dodge it.

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Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

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