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Song Parodies -> "Stains In My Kitchen"

Original Song Title:

"Chained to the Rhythm"

Original Performer:

Katy Perry ft. Skip Marley

Parody Song Title:

"Stains In My Kitchen"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Ever have this one stain that just won't come out? This dude has! Lots of 'em, in fact!
I'm not lazy
Just not really used to this
Which cloth should I pick for it? Man, what a mess
I always knew that I'd end up in trouble, trouble
Upon the exit from my young boy bubble, bubble
Don't feel lonely
Out here in suburbia
Life by myself through me out my rut, I need a touch
Of knowledge cause I've got myself in trouble, trouble
So awkward cause I thought this would be subtle, subtle (ah-ah)
Assumed that I'd make a tiny blob
Not all this lot (woo)

Is it stuck on the table top?
Crap, crap, crap, it's not comin' off
Tryna scrub but it just won't leave
Few shades lighter now, isn't enough for me
Yeah, I need this clean (ah-ah)
Think the fault's on me
For these stains in my kitchen, in my kitchen, in my kitchen
Swear a bunch, really hate this blob
Crap, crap, crap, still not comin' off
Furious cause the thing won't leave
It's the first I found, think I've got seventeen
Yeah, I need them cleaned (ah-ah)
Think the fault's on me
For these stains in my kitchen, in my kitchen, in my kitchen

Up, it won't let
Keep squeezin' out detergent, man
Thought it would work better than that, I'm goin' mad
I honestly thought I would have no trouble, trouble
At scrubbin' 'em out once I had the bubbles, bubbles (ah-ah)
What use (what use) is this stupid, brillo sponge?
Ain't workin' much (woo)

It's still stuck on the table top
Crap, crap, crap, it's not comin' off
Might've scrubbed 'til my poor hands bleed
One half has gone now, bloody thing won't just leave
Yeah, I need this clean (ah-ah)
Think the fault's on me
For these stains in my kitchen, in my kitchen, in my kitchen
Got a hunch 'bout this one small blob (oh-ohoh)
Crap, crap, crap, still not comin' off
It came from that spag bog last week
Only found it now, rest are still a myst'ry
Yeah, I need them cleaned (ah-ah)
Think the fault's on me
For these stains in my kitchen, in my kitchen, in my kitchen (whoa-oh-oh-oh)

Hate this, I'm so tired
Goo on the floor makin' me perspire, ay
Try to clean up my dish dryer
Quite hard, might cause a great big fire
That doesn't mean I'll weasel
Out of this one stupid chore
Or be in a state fetal (oh-oh-oh)
I'm rubbin' this and scrubbin' this until it's fit to sparkle (oh-oh)
Then I'll see, then I'll see the marble (woo)

All this crud on the table top (ho-oh-oh-oh)
Crap, crap, crap, it's not comin' off
Somethin's stuck (somethin's stuck, somethin's stuck, yeah-eah) ev'rywhere, no sheen
Anywhere here now, this could take me all week (it'll take me all week)
Yeah (ah-ah-ah), I need this clean (ah-ah)
Think the fault's on me (oh, my fault) (that's my theory now)
For these stains in my kitchen (in my kitchen now) (I'm appalled)
In my kitchen, in my kitchen (stains in my kitchen)
Got a lot of awful blobs (lotta crud, so gross)
And I've got to wash 'em off (gotta scrub so I'll wash the lot 'til all are gone)
But I've got an awful lot (lot of awful blobs, so gross)
Of these gross (real gross) stains in my kitchen

This another song that I think should've been a lot bigger than it was. Not as much as I Feel It Coming, but still.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.7
How Funny: 3.7
Overall Rating: 3.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   2
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