Hey, how was your weekend? I really gotta know
Got a better social life than me, you know that, bro
Buddy, give the facts, tell a story, please don't go
Gotta tell me right now, man, desp'rate for the real down-low
Brag, brag, brag, won't you?
Sure you rode a tire while sippin' a cold brew
Walked on nails in bare feet? Punched a really drunk dude?
Love your tellin', so compellin', the feats you've cracked

Wish I-I-I cou-ou-ould see all the things you've do-one
But I-I'm not an active dude
So how was your weekend? Really gotta know
Waitin' for an answer, then I'll leave you alone
Like, did you learn an instrument? Guitar or the drums?
Man, how was your weekend? I really gotta know
I really gotta know

Two days and two nights, yeah, lots of time, you know
Could've found a mad wild deer, socked it in the nose
You seem like the kinda guy, yeah, to do that, although
If you didn't, that's fine, just don't leave me in the cold, brr
Weekend, weekend, how'd you spend your weekend?
Cause I spent my weekend just polishin' my sleek head
A bald man, like to rub in the grease, man
No, I'm not lonely, just love tales of your weekend, pally

I wou-ou-ould ju-u-ust read books, but I think no-ot
Cause I-I'd rather talk to you
So how was your weekend? Really gotta know
All I need's an answer and then I'll up and go
Like, did you study medicine? Did you eat a lung?
Man, how was your weekend? I really gotta know
I really gotta know

You don't give a da-amn about what I nee-eed, je-erk
Live vicariously through the stories of your weekend
Even if it's bla-and (don't care if it's bla-a-a-a-and)
Your tale is weak, 'twill se-erve
For what I need to get to sleep at night

So how was your weekend? Really gotta know (wee-ee-eeke-e-e-e-e-e-end)
Just give me your answer and then I'll friggin' go (grab my stuff and go-o-o)
Like, did you find a specimen (a specimen) of rich, alien dung (oh-oh-oh-oh)?
Man, how was your weekend (wee-eekend)? I really gotta know (tell me 'bout your weekend)
Really gotta know (uh)

Na-na-na (yeah), na-na-na (uh), na-na-na, yeah-eah, jerk
Na-na-na (yeah), na-na-na (eh), na-na-na (come on, yeah-eah), please, how was your weekend? (uh)
Na-na-na (yeah), na-na-na (uh), na-na-na, yeah-eah (uh)
Na-na-na (yeah), na-na-na (eh), please, how was your weekend?