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Song Parodies -> "Dumb Crimes"

Original Song Title:

"Some Nights"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Dumb Crimes"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Part of my "Shine Brighter" self-challenge. Partially inspired by Nash's series What The Fuck Is Wrong With You?, and many of the examples here are either taken verbatim or inspired from things from show. Yes, even the guy who hid the chainsaw in his pants. Enjoy!
Sometimes when I'm bored, I indulge my hobby
Of reading 'bout criminals
Some crimes are pulled off by intelligent scoundrels
Some crimes are done by imbeciles

And when I add up which ones I prefer
The one that wins for sure is the latter, oh
Crimes done by morons, the list just goes on
Dumb crimes, love them forevermore
Oh-whoa, oh-oo-whoa-oh, oh-oo-whoa-oh, oh-oh
Oh-whoa, oh-oo-whoa-oh-oh-oh, oh-oo-whoa-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh

Thought it would make sense, I'm sure
What are you naked for?
It's hard to steal things when you're floppy
You may be too strapped to afford their price
Hidden in your pants, not right
May be rump steaks or a damn chainsaw
You're not that well hung, sir, your plan is flawed

Please think twice
Before you order fast food when you're high
Though I laugh at your blundering, that's who I am
Was this, man, you big pla-a-a-a-an, weird naked guy?
Mmm, mmm

Well, dumb crimes, it seems that they'll never end
Jerks who punch folks for miscounting change
These dumb crimes are made of the utmost win
I haven't laughed this hard since smeg knows when

And I still crack up, some guy claimed that ghosts
Had nicked his resume, what a moron, oh
Dumb people in scores, dumb people galore
Dumb crimes, what a joke
(Dumb robbers)

And holy shit, wait until you read this
Some guy planned ahead to strip
Danced in his underwear, get this
(What morons)

In front of his boss, in undies, just for his boss, his brain is lost
But why? I'm lost, was he on bath salts, makes sense, none
Makes sense, none
It's just dumb
Oh, what fun!

Six hundred stories, still there's more
"In Florida" seems to be a trend
These crazy twits, I'm not sure if they know what "decency" means
They're claiming that it's just "art", get stuffed!
That one will not fly with me, hell no
What the fuck is wrong with all y'all
And why am I still laughing, son?

A guy just broke up with his lover
So he burnt up all her stuff
Laughing so hard, there's tears in my eyes
Man, you wouldn't believe the crazy, stupid things that I've read of
Nonsensical crimes


Oh-whoa, oh-oo-whoa-oh, oh-oo-whoa-oh, oh-oh
Oh-whoa, oh-oo-whoa-oh-oh-oh, oh-oo-whoa-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh

Reading online, I shouldn't believe
This should be fiction, but it's real life, see
You can't make up this idiocy

Doesn't make sense, it should be fiction
Doesn't make sense, it really happened, oh
Doesn't make sense, why was he naked?
Doesn't make sense, this really happened, oh
Seriously, watch What The Fuck Is Wrong With You. Hilarity.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - February 26, 2013 - Report this comment
Dumb criminals + your parody skills = a memorable read. Shine on! ;D
Peter Andersson - February 26, 2013 - Report this comment
Hey, I'm starting to worry about you, seems you watch waaaay too much nude crime reports. ;-)
Patrick - March 08, 2013 - Report this comment
I noticed years ago that men who run amok with swords always undress first. This parody reminds me of the afternoon "reality" video shows. Like the guy who tried to hold up the Duncan Donuts and got a face full of hot coffee. This song conjures up a lot of great moments now on youtube.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

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