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Song Parodies -> "Two Sheets"

Original Song Title:

"Two Weeks"

Original Performer:

FKA twigs

Parody Song Title:

"Two Sheets"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Two sheets. One flat, one fitted. That's the entire load of washing. How is it such a pain in the arse?
I know how it's s'pposed to function but I keep on havin' problems
Been taught how it's s'pposed to function but I'm always havin' problems
Fully aware how it functions but it's never not a problem

It never works, it blows
Makes my brain hurt (find it easy? Do it better)
I know it's only done once a month, still hounded
By how I always suck in ev'ry way, can't make it fold over right

I know how it's s'pposed to function but I keep on havin' problems (fold over all nice)
Fightin' these rectangles made of fabric, who cares if it's cotton (fold over all nice)?
Load is not that giant, only two sheets yet it makes my mind hurt
Fold over all nice

Why won't it work? This blows
My shoulders hurt (twistin' 'round at ev'ry angle)
Just tryna keep it from draggin' where the dirt is
I can't say I'm waitin' for rain 'cause inside, still can't fold over all nice

Been taught how it's s'pposed to function but I'm always havin' problems (fold over all nice)
Fightin' with the breezes that create a banner from this cotton (fold over all nice)
How is this so tryin'? It's just two sheets, shouldn't make my mind hurt
Fold over all nice

Even when it's pourin', issues keep on rollin'
It's still a pain keepin' them off the floor, freakin'
At fluff that gets upon the stuff that I'm washin'
And no matter what airer type I use, I'm reelin'
'Cause I'm always needin' multiples, they're keepin'
Me from then usin' them for the loads I've got down the line

I've never worked out a good method to get 'round it
Fully aware how it functions but it's never not a problem
I simply curse when it's the time for bed cloth drownin'
I'm not gonna skip it, I won't sleep on what smells like pure garbage (fold over all nice)
Nice, nice, nice, nice
I know how it's s'pposed to function but I keep on havin' problems
I'll just grit my teeth and be glad it's just my bedsheets I'm washin' (fold over all nice)
Nice, nice, nice
One more, I'd be cryin', I'll take two sheets though they make my mind hurt
Fold over all nice

Also there's a pillowcase in there but that's a piece of piss to hang up so it didn't make it into the parody. I totally didn't forget about it until now, shut up.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   14
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 14
 

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