Hey!
Hey!

Since I was just four years old, any competition takes so many goes (hey!)
Ev'rybody makes the same damn call: "I screwed up, can we do that over?"
A fair thing to say, sometimes you blow through absolutely no fault of your own (hey!)
But what's such a bother, at least one part: they don't do it only once, bogus (hey!)

A do-over should be done if something has buggered up
Hard to believe it's that justified, bud, when it's become a constant
"Sorry, that's a mulligan, gonna have to repeat it"
And so they do until they have won, how is that not pure bollocks?

Hey!
Hey!

No end to their retries, no mistake is their fault, unlimited chances to hit the ball (hey!)
But the part that brings me absolute gall? I get zero do-overs (hey!)
That can't be how things are so, must be some kinda multi-person joke (hey!)
A prank where ev'ryone's in the know except me, that's bogus (hey!)

Second chances? I get none yet they all get millions
Swear that around here there must be someone who can see that that's bollocks
"Sorry, that's a mulligan, gonna have to repeat it"
Next time they say that, I might be done, that shouldn't be a constant

Ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay
Diddle-ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay (ah-whoo!)
Ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay
Diddle-ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay (whoo!)

Ev'ryone hates me, I don't think that's fair, think I'll have to steer things until they work (hey!)
If they want redos, fine, I'm gonna get them there, no doubt that'll be a promise (hey!)
Gonna tackle them down to the ground, kick the ball far away, twist limbs around (hey!)
I don't care what card I get, they've earned it now, I won't stop until they stop it

If they want that kick re-run, must deal with my fisticuffs
Until I'm carried away in a box, I'm making this my promise
"Sorry, that's a mulligan, gonna have to repeat it"?
You'll eat that phrase and also some mud until you choose to stop it (hey!)

Ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay
Diddle-ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay (ah-whoo!)
Ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay
Diddle-ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay-diddle-ay, ay-diddle-iddle-iddle-ay (alright)