Intro: This girl’s got me so pissed
Buz baby, I’m no therapist… (No…)

Chorus: Got me out here looking like a shrink
Tell me what you think
Your boyfriend really stinks
But do you know how bad that it hurts to hear this?
Like needles, but much worse (Wait a minute!)
Now you’re out here spilling like a glass
Saying he’s an ass and he doesn’t have much class
But did you know how hard that I worked to keep you from
Falling for that jerk? (Wait a minute!)

Pre-Chorus: The friend zone is a bad place
It gives me a big sad face
You’re stuck down into last place
Can’t have it, can’t have it (No…)
Bet it’d be nice for you to dump your problems on me
But nah! (Nah…)

Chorus: Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
He treats you bad and that drama’s no good
Tearing you down like I knew that he would
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Feeling enraged cuz I’ve said this for years
Stifle the rage as I claw at my ears

Verse 2: Maybe right now’s not the time to brag
Offer you my hand, use my shoulder as a rag
Oh man that’s gross
You thought you had smarter better sense
You’re wrong, no offense (Wait a minute!)
But there are more fishes in the sea
Sweet as spiny lobster, but won’t give you STDs
And yeah, I know how hard that it is to date again
But this time heed my words (Wait a minute!)

Pre-Chorus: Now friendship should go two ways
And not just on your blue days
You tell me those are through days (Nah…)
You’re two-faced, you’re two-faced
I’m sure it’d be nice to unload all that drama on me
But nah!

Chorus: Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
He treats you bad, you unload it on me
Making me sad cuz I know you won’t leave
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Feeling incensed cuz I told you he’d burn
It makes no sense, but you never do learn

Bridge: Drop that flop, baby
Better stop, better stop that sop, baby
If you chop, if you chop that flop maybe
We can talk, we can talk and talk, baby
Oh please
Drop that flop, baby
Better stop, better stop that sop, baby
If you chop, if you chop that flop maybe
We can talk, we can talk and talk, baby
Oh yeah!

Chorus: Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Cuz I feel bad, when he treats you like dirt
But I’m not the man who can make it not hurt
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Baby, I’m sorry (I’m not Maury)
Feeling so torn never thought this would end
Should’ve been warned that I wasn’t your friend

Outro: I know that you’re so pissed
So maybe, tell a therapist
I’m no therapist, no therapist…