Oh crap, that's quite a bit spooky

Pass out cold
Didn't heed the warnin' that was told
I might scream
From the stuff, awful stuff that I've seen

What have I uncovered? Should I do a runner?
Or should I watch over to make sure it stays right here?
Nobody should suffer, feel any rougher
I need an answer before I lose my soul

The herald of the end of days as been unleashed today
I have set the beast free 'cause I failed to see
The words that had been written plain in my real foolish haste
Things that man should not see have all been, by me, set free

"Oh, hell no!"
That's what your stock action film hero
Says, I fear
That my response was cruder than "Oh dear"

Because I uncovered some hideous monster
That will run me over while I act the headlight deer
Mysterious, wonder if it feels hunger?
Don't have the answer, know the wrong way to know

The smarter man would run away but my damn legs just stay
And that includes my feet, no loopholes for me
Maybe this creature has a brain, could be convinced to wait
Until I have with me all the weapons that I need

Lots of weapons that I need

This thing I've uncovered, this terrible monster
Will give a "Game Over" to this whole planet, I fear
Yet some of you wonder "Where was it under?"
I have that answer, hope I've not hyped it so

It wasn't beneath an old grave or inside some crypt, say
Not a pyramid, see, it's less than those scenes
Under my bed? That's a "no way", I vacuum that each day
No, this horrible beast was behind my frozen peas