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Song Parodies -> "sheathin"

Original Song Title:

"breathin"

Original Performer:

Ariana Grande

Parody Song Title:

"sheathin"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

You're all revved up, ready to go and wait, what? Battle's over? We're not stabbing people? But I wanted to stab people!
One day I will slay
All of my foolish enemies before my higher-up's start quittin'
So lame, can't use my blade
Sick of puttin' my sword away before I can see their blood spray
Heart won't stop pumpin' though my smile's fallin'
Thought a big fight had been instigated, mmm-mmm
I don't like the sight of that flag so white
Nought I can do but sigh and grit my teeth the whole time

Sick of sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin'
Guess no-one wants to bleed, they love sheathin'
Sick of sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin'
A joke that's on repeat, don't like sheathin', mmm-mmm-mmm

You might think I should try
To cram my head up my arse now, battlegrounds aren't my birthright now
I say: try to just think twice
'Cause it's not once this situation has decided to wreck my day
One side starts gunnin', blood might start fallin'
Doesn't need to be elaborated, mmm-mmm
I see signs and I let my sword skills shine
But new orders come by that once more, we shall not fight

Sick of sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin'
I've got a battle need, I don't want sheethin'
Sick of sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin'
Don't want my sword pristine, so please stop sheathin', mmm-mmm-mmm, yeah-eah

It's not, it's not fair, it's not, it's not fair
It's not, it's not fair, not fair
It's not, it's not fair, it's not, it's not fair
It's not, it's not fair, yeah-eah-eah-eah-eah-eah

Sick of sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin' (blows)
What kind of milit'ry is always sheathin'?
Sick of sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin' and sheathin'
I swear I'm not a freak (oh-eah-eah-ee), I just hate sheathin', mmm-mmm-mmm, yeah-eah

Start-and-stop constant (constant start-and-stoppin'), my morale's fallin'
Oh-ooh-ooh-whoa-oh-ooh, stop with the sheathin', oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, yeah-eah
I just might go try mercenary style (bounty hunt style, yeah-eah)
There's far less sheathin', mmm-mmm-mmm, yeah-eah (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, yeah-eah)

Kinda reminds of a DnD session a while ago when we all rolled initiative and set up battle music for an escaped creature in a magic shop...and my character put it to sleep on the first turn (I rolled a good initiative...for once) before it could even knock any potions over. Bit of an anticlimax, but it's rare that I actually get Sleep to work, so I was happy for that, at least.

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Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

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