Song Parodies -> "Donkey Kong U"

Original Song Title:

"Honkytonk U"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"Donkey Kong U"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

With majors people can already waste tons of money on with no prospect of getting a job when graduating I think "Video Game Performance" is probably one that will make a rise in the near future.

If you're failing in the arcade
And that Frogger game's takin' all your dimes
Come turn that frown upside down
There's a college here that can put you in your prime
You'll slam those buttons and shove joysticks
Until you earn a plaque it's not a scam
Help you beat Mike Tyson's Punch Out
Until you have big blisters on your hands

You blew through stacks of quarters, Jack
We'll teach you the cheat codes for when you play
Help you kick ass in Space Invaders
Centipede and then of course Death Race
You'll dig as fast as Dig Dug digs
Controller you won't bash, Learn all the moves from me, Yeah
You'll start on Pong and Pac-Man
And then learn all about Nintendo Wii

You'll slide beer in Tapper's tavern
Once you were shitty now fast as a cheetah
Every Tetris square's in your control
And you have even saved the Princess Zelda
The adults call them dumb toys
They don't understand the skills that you must prove
I am a nerd, geek and dork but I'm the Dean of Donkey Kong U

Those zombie heads you'll sever
In House of the Dead you'll tear out all their spines
When you're on a killing spree, You're sweaty with that plastic gun you'll strive
You'll pluck Guitar Hero strings
When I boot this cabniet up it brings a crowd
Learn PC classics like DOOM
You'll earn your degree and make your mama proud

You'll learn languages like Q*Bert's
Worth every penny I'll make you a genius
Billy Mitchell's scared, He's just a schmo
When we get done his trophies are worth peanuts
Here's the news, Paperboy
You'll get some fans who aren't just pasty dudes
I am a nerd, geek and dork but I'm the Dean of Donkey Kong U

That's right
A nerd, geek and dork but I'm the Dean of Donkey Kong U!!!

Just keeping track here's all the video games mentioned: 1) Frogger, 2) Mike Tyson's Punch Out, 3) Space Invaders, 4) Centipede, 5) Death Race, 6) Dig Dug, 7) Pong, 8) Pac-Man, 9) Tapper, 10) Tetris, 11) Legend of Zelda, 12) House of the Dead, 13) Guitar Hero, 14) DOOM, 15) Q*Bert, 16) Paperboy

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User Comments

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Jonathan - June 13, 2014 - Report this comment

how much is a tuition to Donkey Kong U? will $555 cover it?

Agrimorfee - June 15, 2014 - Report this comment

This was pretty enjoyable, with not an ounce of irony to change the nerdy spirit of it. Where do I sign up?

Abbott Skelding - June 24, 2014 - Report this comment

This was really fun. A nice title sub and pacing was pretty spot on. Excellent work!

Max Power - June 26, 2014 - Report this comment

I'll never be able to attend, oh well. 555 bananas.

Blaydeman - July 01, 2014 - Report this comment

(Artistry) Very gamer of you LOL! Loved the references and the general concept. Very fun.

bobpiecheese - July 01, 2014 - Report this comment

(Artistry) Pacing was a tad clunky areas, though that could just be my brain revolting against country again. Great parody, even if the references were mostly old-school (I like variety). 555 power ups!

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