Sometimes I have this thou-ought
So: why'd we all hate Barney? I don't get it, ma-an
Show meant for tiny to-ots
That we despised, real reason we lacked
Sure, that "I Love You" song was pure tripe, really hard to forget
But was that simple slight worth all the damn death threats?
Don't think anybody on the bandwagon watched the show

The way we talked about it
Barney was a dark emissary from he-ell
But when you read about it
Sure, it's childish drivel, but that's all to tell
It's hard to understand the constant rage that us, as children, went through
Against a dumb, purple T-Re-ex that we never viewed
If you asked your friends why they all loathed it? "I don't know"

No kids shows I know o-off
Get this much vitriol from ev'ry po-ore
Sesame Street? Dora?
Not even Caillou is this abhorred
I keep seein', I keep readin' people seethin' 'til their throats are sore
Might've joined in once or twice myself, I won't do that no more
Cause there's worse things I can insult, Barney's a dead joke