Song Parodies -> "Cheese Puffs (In My Closet)"

Original Song Title:

"She Wolf"

Original Performer:

"Cheese Puffs (In My Closet)"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

S.O.S., see what he buys
S.O.S., or else he cries
He's got cheese puffs in his eyes
Eat 'em now, eat 'em now, eat 'em now

Yeah the saturated fats can be seen all around me
Eating the bag alone ain't no grand larceny
Wide awake now, Kwik-E-Mart open
I got the craving, oh damn I'm hungry!

I've been wasting my health, it's true
Sunday to Sunday, from payday to payday
Not getting enough carbohydrates or decent vitamins might just explain it
Seems that I've been recently accused--
Broke the vending machine at the office
So now I got a job as a grocer
To get me much closer to the aisle just to see it

I hide cheese puffs in my closet
Orange stuff that's so crunchy! (Yummm!)
I hide cheese puffs in my closet
Want 'em all for me to eat (a crunch-a, crunch!)

Got some stashed in my car, eating 10 bags each day
My grocer job so far, despair? Ah, No way!
These crispy crunchies get me so impudent
Can I avoid 'em? No, I just couldn't!

Don't gimme no Jay's or Pringles or Wise, I will catch ya later
When I find the next bag, it's so fine, I exhale hard like Darth Vader
I eat 'em with a little Chivas or Milwaukee, it's what I enjoy (uh!)
So I lead a life of crime, when I hide a bag in my pants, I am a naughty boy!

There's more cheese puffs in my closet
Odor oh so cheddary! (Yummm!)
There's more cheese puffs in my closet
Eat enough so it crusts my teeth! (a-crunch crunch!)

S.O.S.--send out the spies
S.O.S.--see how he hides
Hides the cheese puffs, and he lies (cruncha cruncha crucnha...)
Seek him out, seek him out, seek him out!

S.O.S., no snacks, he cries
S.O.S., what a surprise!
He eats cheese puffs, not French fries
Breaking out, breaking out, breaking out!

I hide cheese puffs in my closet
For my late night snack party (a-cruncha, crunch!)

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The Observer - December 02, 2014 - Report this comment

Voter, your arbitrary voting of 211, rather than all 1's, fools no one. You don't judge by merit, you are just spiteful.

Matthias - December 02, 2014 - Report this comment

This would make for a good commercial jingle. Got me hungry for some cheese puffs!

Blaydeman - December 09, 2014 - Report this comment

(Artistry) I don't think this went far enough to justify it's absurdity. It's was just kind of bland. I need you to attack the track a little more. Make it a little saltier, much like the namesake cheese puffs (I'm fonder of the crunchy-style myself over the puffed TBH). Not bad, but I wish you've would've pushed it a little harder. Not to mention there were also some pacing stumbles that threw me off a bit.

Max Power - December 16, 2014 - Report this comment

All I know is this, without these, we'd be lame.

bobpiecheese - December 16, 2014 - Report this comment

(Artistry) I agree with B-Man, this wasn't nearly wacky enough. Besides, who keeps snacks in the closet? That's just asking for dust and spiders and not-nearly-as-clever-as-you'd-think innuendos.

Abbott Skelding - December 16, 2014 - Report this comment

I agree that it could have been pushed further, but I still really like the level of absurdity that it reached. I liked the "naughty boy" line the most. Really funny stuff and I think the pacing was pretty spot on. Nicely done!

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