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Song Parodies -> "Rock Band"

Original Song Title:

"Rockstar"

Original Performer:

Nickelback

Parody Song Title:

"Rock Band"

Parody Written by:

Wolverine

The Lyrics

Youtube it here if you don't know this one.

You can also find several Youtube videos of people playing the game, including this one, which appears to be the "band" Earth Wind and CENTAUR I reference, back when they were only around 74 Million points.
I'm through with banging out beats to songs I'll never get past
It’s like I’ve been up playing it for days and I'm never gonna last
These sticks haven’t helped me, pads aren’t working, over and done

(Tell me what you want)

I want a kick ass Bass full of excellent Hard licks
And an Expert I can learn Guitar picks
And a king size Voice good enough for Black Hole Sun

(Huh, so what you need?)

I'll take anyone who can play Medium
And a big black rock music compendium
Wanna join the leaderboard club at thirty-seven thousand points

(pwned that, you noob)

I’ll scrap my living room, toss old moldy chairs
Make some room for my band mates’ stuff upstairs
Practice so much KISS it weakens their finger joints

(So how ya gonna do it?)

I wanna trade this life for fortune and fame
And act like girls forget that I’m so lame

'Cause we all just wanna be fake rock stars
Pretend we’re big shot posers smoking big cigars
We have no talent and our game is weak
Screw Guitar Hero and it’s winning streak
‘Cause we don’t care about social norms
We’re on MTV on all game platforms
Every Youtube entry’s gonna make us rich
Or a world-class laughingstock I don’t know which
And um…

Hey hey I can’t stop playing Rock Band
Hey hey I’m addicted to Rock Band

I used to play golf like Tiger, frag guys in Halo
Hire eight prostitutes to score in Grand Theft Auto
Now a Madden football game doesn’t do a damn thing for me

(How ‘bout some Space Invaders, Extreme)

I never see my buds or the latest concert
Pissed my girlfriend off, threw her pastry dessert
I don’t need her anyway, her cooking gives me dysentery

(So how ya gonna eat now?)

I’d like to trade this life for fortune and fame
But rather stay inside to play this game

'Cause we’re all just actin’ like fake rockstars
And live in parents' houses driving rusted cars
Nirvana t-shirts in the laundry heap
I’d say I’m troubled but I’m not that deep
And we'll hang out at my daddy’s bars
Downstairs list’ning to 30 Sec’s To Mars
And we dare not notice how we wound up there
“I’m a deadbeat mommy, kick my derriere”
And we'll practice Jet and Boston too
Learn the latest Bang Camero, they’re today's The Who
We'll play you anything with a crooked smile
Everybody calls me an Aerosmith-o-phile
Well, Hey hey I can’t stop playing Rock Band

I'm gonna play those songs like Earth Wind & Centaurs
Sacrifice my drums on my Nine Inch altars
Get “Green Grass” seeping out of every pore
And play them constantly for 90 million score

Well we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
Our lives are empty and our time is cheap
We'll all stay slackers, what we’ve sewn we’ll reap
And we'll meet girls in the corner bars
Try to impress them with our Rock Band stars
Only skanks and floozies gonna wind up there
Not a classy woman with her tasteful hair
And we'll practice Rush, Bon Jovi too
Learn the latest Smashing Pumpkins, and Death of the Cool
We'll play you anything with a crooked smile
Everybody calls me a Rolling-Stones-o-phile
Well, hey hey I can’t stop playing Rock Band
Hey hey I’m addicted to Rock Band

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 5   8
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - June 25, 2008 - Report this comment
LOVE the game!!! I don't known it, because I'm not going to pay that much for a game, but I've played it at friends' homes and I LOVE IT!!! Expecially on the 360, because you can downloaded even cooler songs, such as The Grateful Dead!
Wolverine - June 25, 2008 - Report this comment
I like it too. When I was out in Brooklyn for Memorial Day, a mutual friend brought it over to the BBQ. And I was hooked. I got addicted to the game, so I bought it the day I got home.Then I realized the game isn't *NEARLY* as much fun by yourself, and lost interest. It's definitely a social/party game. And then when I read about people posting themselves on Youtube, and a group that had played it so much they're at 90 Million points...I knew I had to do this song.
Red Ant - June 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Quite an excellent write, Chris. Loved the "I’d say I’m troubled but I’m not that deep" line the best.
lilRodeoStar - June 25, 2008 - Report this comment
Oh, GuitarHero, god o'RockStar, grant me the ~voice~ of velvet . . . .
Jonathan S. - July 01, 2008 - Report this comment
I could've done without the crudities ("skanks", "p***ed", etc), but otherwise incredibly well-written. A 555 for sure.
Agrimorfee - July 07, 2008 - Report this comment
(Amiright Idol) I liked this a lot, I'd say it's one of the best you've done. I'm not sure if you meant to repeat 2 lines of the OS chorus verbatim in the last stanza, but the meaning is clear enough if that was the case.
Below Average Dave - July 14, 2008 - Report this comment
(AmIRight Idol) Maybe it's because I'm biased, but I loved this one. I love the OS, which obviously is recordable, I love the topic, I love the execution . . . in short I LOVED IT! Honestly, the Grand Theft Auto line was so well placed and unexpected, and the 'screw Guitar Hero's Winning Streak'. You go Wolverine, and perfect song to do it with--great job. Jonathan, one question. . .is Skanks and Pissed really considered crude? I mean I've heard both those words in daytime programming, not trying to start nothing--we are past that, I'm just honestly curious.
Red Ant - July 15, 2008 - Report this comment
I didn't have the chance to read this to TOS the first time through: now that I have, it takes on a whole new life. Lots of LOL lines in here, even though I'm not that familiar with Rock Band.
Below Average Dave - August 14, 2008 - Report this comment
Wolverine, your song has been recorded in the AmIRight All Stars project. Congratulations on winning Round 2 with this entry of the AmIRight Idol competition, enjoy the recording

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