This is no joke, believe me, I'm not pretendin'
This fridge that also toasts cheese? It's patent pendin'

I won't let you horn in on my slice of pie
Wish you'd made up a shirt-tuckin' tie
Your mockin', I can't stand it, wish you'd wish me well
I made shoes with door-lock function and they only slightly smell
I'm gonna get that glory with this truck that folds
So it can reach to high stories, it's patent pendin', of that fact I'm sure
There's no way that you'll take it
Cause I sent 'em yesterday

No way that you'll dissuade me, resolve ain't endin'
These socks that share all your tweets? They're patent pendin'
I'll roll in all of the bucks, need a loan never
Be as smart as me? You'll find they're failed endeavours

Your inventions are borin', what's wrong with your mind?
"Mine make more sense, practical, I've found"
That's such a load of rot, think outside the box
Made a way to make sheep taste like pineapple when they're axed off
Stop with your silly stories 'bout what may unfold
That's no way to get that glory and patent pendin' would not be in store
My edible book, taste it
No point wasting it, okay (swear I)?

I'll get huge-ass royalties once they're through testin' (am quite far from crazy)
My bridge that resets your Wii is patent pendin' (I'll dive)
It will make a pile of bucks for me to swim in (in my dosh one day)
Aim to be Scrooge-McDuck-like, don't need your disses (they won't say it sucks)

They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks (ooh, they won't say it sucks)
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks (they won't say it sucks)
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks (they won't say it sucks)
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks (none of it sucks, bud, I)
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks (don't think that they'll hate it)
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks (hey, hey)
They won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks (hey, hey)

Soon I'll get letters, you'll see (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
Replies they're sendin' (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
About that knife that texts free (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
It's patent pendin' (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
I swear that it'll make bucks (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
No debt forever (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
Must keep that thought in my mind (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
Before it severs (they won't say it sucks, they won't say it sucks)
I'm a real genius, you see, it's how I'm trendin'
Replacement hand that sings Queen? That's patent pendin'