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Song Parodies -> "My Ram"

Original Song Title:

"I Am"

Original Performer:

Mary J. Blige

Parody Song Title:

"My Ram"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Knock, knock!
Hey, no, no, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter
Ain't no gateway that I cannot enter
Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter
Boy, with my ram, with my ram

Think you've locked up tight, no-one's gonna breach
Might be real proud of yourself
But you'll be undone by your pride, you see
Source of why they'll say you fell
All the locks and chains that you've rigged up now
Will not last, they'll fall apart
When I bust my way through, just break the place
No crazy complex plan, not hard unlike this rod, mate

Ain't no gateway that I cannot enter (no, no gateway)
Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter (no doorway)
Ain't no gateway that I cannot enter (no)
Boy, with my ram, boy, with my ram (no doorway, no gateway)
With my ram (no doorway, no gateway)
With my ram (no doorway, no gateway)
Oh, no doorway can be breach-proof because of my ram

Your alarms make no diff'rence when I'm comin' (comin')
Turn your front door into splinters when I'm comin' (comin')
I'm not at a slow pace, one smash, I'm there
The front door (the front door) or back door (or back door)
Or that friggin' useless mesh thing used with
Ev'ry laundry room I've been in because
That breeze flowin' helps dry off all your clothes

Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter (yeah-eah-eah-eah)
Ain't no gateway that I cannot enter (make my own way to get to you)
Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter (oh-ooh-ooh)
Boy, with my ram, with my ram (no gateway, no doorway)
With my ram (no gateway, no doorway) (ooh, don't stand near or you'll be goo)
With my ram (no gateway, no doorway)
Oh, no gateway will keep me out because of my ram

But I know that you don't have a clue why I'm so
Eager to bring you low just like your busted door
It's quite a simple thing, thought it was rather clear (ah-ah)
I want my toaster brought back to me, no joke

Ain't no gateway that I cannot enter
Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter (so placate me)
Ain't no gateway that I cannot enter
Boy, with my ram, with my ram
Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter
Ain't no gateway that I cannot enter
Ain't no doorway that I cannot enter
Boy, with my ram (oh-ooh-whoa), with my ram (no gateway, no doorway)
With my ram (no gateway, no doorway)
With my ram (no gateway, no doorway)
Oh, no gateway will keep me from my toast, thank you, ram (no doorway, no gateway)
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, thank you, ram (oh, oh-ooh) (no doorway, no gateway)
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, thank you, ram (oh, no, no, no) (no doorway, no gateway)
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh (oh) (oh, no, no), no doorway will stop me, 'cause I've got this huge ram
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh, this large ram
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, no, this hard ram
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh (oh), stop gigglin' at me, I'll smash with this ram (no gateway, no doorway)
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh, this long ram (no gateway, no doorway)
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, no, my ram (no gateway, no doorway)
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh, oh-oh (oh), just give what's mine to me, or face my huge, long ram

If your battering ram does not have the point of contact designed after an actual ram's head, then what are you even doing?

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   13
 13
 13
 

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