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Song Parodies -> "Kiss My Rear End!"

Original Song Title:

"In The End"

Original Performer:

Linkin Park

Parody Song Title:

"Kiss My Rear End!"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

As Bender would put it, 'Bite my shiny metal ass!'
(It starts with)
Cursing, from this dumb guy
He says that I'm a dipsh*t and always cry
What's in his mind? Doesn't he have time
To exceed at life?
(What a schmoe)
Time isn't what I have got
10 minutes late, haven't time for this rot
It's nearly time for the start of the day
While he rambles away
(It's quite a spiel)
Man, look at this guy go
Watch his lips flow as he calls me 'slow'
Still he goes on, some words that I don't know
Are yelled at me now, I can't take no mo'
I kept my temper inside
But now my fuse is fried, it's all gone to pot
So this prick must be dealt with brutally, he
will be sorry, that he ever

Got on my nerves, now he'll be served
'Kiss my rear end!' I yell to that dumb bastard
He must be drunk, to pull this stunt
'Kiss my rear end!' teach him not to get plastered

But then, at ten past five
He decided to yell at me one more time
Keep it in mind, when he tried at nine
To piss me off, I
(Had made him cry)
Because of the way he was mocking me
He's not gonna up his popularity
Remembering all the fools who have dissed me
I'm surprised
(He tries so hard)
Guys who have dissed me once before
Would face a broken nose if they had tried once more
This nut is at it again
Can he not hear me say 'Kiss my rear end?'
He must be so dumb inside
But even though I tried, I just lost the plot
Grabbed him by the shirt, threw him in the dirt, heard
That little nerd still going, so

I said quite clear, into his ear
'Kiss my rear end!' By now he should've heard me
But to be safe, right to his face
'Kiss my rear end!' That's the last he'll annoy me

Some say my threat, won't work
That he'll continue like a jerk
I might be pissed
But my comeback line is the worst

But they ain't seen my arse
It's hairy, big as a barge
And if it's kissed
Then you will lose your lunch quite fast

So don't you dare, diss my cut hair
'Kiss my rear end!' you don't know when to stop it
So don't provoke, or crack bad jokes
'Kiss my rear end!' enough to make you vomit
Man, I haven't done rap in a while. I hope it doesn't show.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   21

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Stephen Harrington - April 21, 2008 - Report this comment
555, this is a vast improvement over the OS, which I can't stand.
smack - April 21, 2008 - Report this comment
< !!! >
Barry Wilson JR. - April 21, 2008 - Report this comment
Nice job. I do like the OS, but this is a rather nice take on it. 555.
Below Average Dave - April 22, 2008 - Report this comment
You know what, when I first heard this song on the radio, I could have sworn they said "In My Rear End" and I busted up laughing and everyone looked at me funny. . .your take on this song is very creative, and brave--it's not the easiest of songs to parody (in fact we ranked it '23rd' on the epic 40 list) congrats, 5s from me.
Jason - May 11, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) 555 Ass-kisses!
Matthias - May 11, 2008 - Report this comment
Such anger, angst, and amusment! (Oh and don't forget that other A-word "Asses")
Max Power - May 17, 2008 - Report this comment
555, I haven't done rap since Super Bowl Shuffle and that was over 2 years ago.
Peter Andersson - May 25, 2008 - Report this comment
SOTM - YouTube can kiss my lily-white derreiere for brown-nosing the LP copyright lawyers that has forced them to take away your suggested video of the original. Not that I couldn't find it anyway...
Agrimorfee - May 27, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This was alright, but you've written much funnier stuff. Sorry, Conqy.
Phil Alexander - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
A fun rant rather than a funny one - I bet it felt good to get it out of your system.
Kristof Robertson - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) As Phil said, fun rather than funny, bobpie...a little more detail as to what pisses you off would lift this to the next level. Still, well done! 555
Guy - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM-Apr-08) This was ass kissin' er I mean ass kickin' good.
Guy - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM-Apr-08) This was ass kissin' er I mean ass kickin' good.
Red Ant - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
Well done on a hard OS: you did great on the meter and rhymes. I agree with Kristof about the detail, but imagining this as a Chester Bennington (or whatever his name is) diss made it better. =)
Below Average Dave - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Very well done on the rhyming buddy. You took on an enormous song this month, I congratulate on pulling it off. A little more comedy would really push this to the next level though. Keep it up TCOP!
Mikey Squirrel - May 31, 2008 - Report this comment
SOTM- I'll have to remember not piss you off. very funny and good rhyming. Well done, Conqueror.
jazelle - December 06, 2008 - Report this comment
man thats just dissing linkin park!! i hate you...
Invisible Boy - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Great job on a tough OS...
Jeff Reuben - March 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Excellent song, I missed this month. Glad I got a chance to come back!
kevin - April 01, 2009 - Report this comment
goot times had by all lol good job
Silver Power - June 14, 2009 - Report this comment
Some really great lines in here, and I liked the top comment's Futurama reference, a good touch. 555 kisses to your ass. [no homo] [[not that there's anything wrong with that]] [[[i realize seinfeld references are played out]]]
Mark Scotti - June 29, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Great job, angry song, went well with the OS
Guy - July 04, 2009 - Report this comment

See comment above - still kicks @SS!
Agrimorfee - July 08, 2009 - Report this comment
(ABC) Still smoochin'...
Leo Keough - July 09, 2009 - Report this comment
ABC5(J/K) This farce was as big as a barge!!!...555!!!...Great match with the OS and very well paced!!!...Love it when someone else does my ranting for me - saves me from getting my own face bashed in!
Matthias - July 09, 2009 - Report this comment
See Above... I still need to say "Effin' A"
Below Average Dave - July 09, 2009 - Report this comment
No Change in my opinion on this one.

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