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Song Parodies -> "Andante, You Jerk"

Original Song Title:

"The Last Day on Earth"

Original Performer:

Kate Miller-Heidke

Parody Song Title:

"Andante, You Jerk"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Music is as fast as you want it to be...unless the rest of the orchestra points out that you shouldn't.
Slow down
Cause half of us are fumbling
You dunce
Put us off our good noting
Eh-eh-ee-yeah-eah-ee, yeah-eah-ee-yeah-ah, die (die, die, die)
Eh-eh-ee-yeah-eah-ee, yeah-eah-ee-yeah-hey (yeah-hey, yeah-hey)

It's andante, you jerk
And that means (that means, that means)
That your speed (your speed, your speed)
To the end of this work
Throws us all off, you see
Brakes on, geez

You need
To follow the damn sheet
Cause it's right
And you're not, cut the speed
Eh-eh-ee-yeah-eah-ee, yeah-eah-ee-yeah-ah, die (die, die, die)
Eh-eh-ee-yeah-eah-ee, yeah-eah-ee-yeah-hey (yeah-hey, yeah-hey)

It's andante, you jerk
No quick breeze (quick breeze, quick breeze)
But you see (you see, you see)
"Reach the end of this work"
Is not the goal to beat
Pull back, geez

You yell that we're slower, that's right
This score ain't allegro, it's more snail
If you think it's great to speed now
Why did you choose this piece, you twit?

It's andante, you jerk
It's agreed (agreed, agreed)
That that means (that means, that means)
"Quickly end the whole work"
Destroys the whole damn piece
Eh-eh-ee-yeah-eah-ee, yeah-eah-ee-yeah-ah, die (die, die, die)
Eh-eh-ee-yeah-eah-ee, yeah-eah-ee-yeah-hey (yeah-hey, yeah-hey)

Sure we've been through this stupid situation
Over and over, repeat the same damn conversation
"Slow down, please" "Don't get it, why should I?"
Because page nine is where we're at, but you've raced to page twenty-eight
Please brake, please brake, please brake, alright?
Know we've been through this silly situation
Over and over, repeatin' all the conversations
"Hold back, please" "Man, up yours, why should I?" (dude, shut up)
Because we're live, jamming's fine in practice, mate, but we're up on stage
Please brake, please brake, please brake, alright (you're a jerk)?
Please brake, please brake, please brake, alright?
Please brake, please brake, please brake, alright?
Please brake, please brake, please brake, alright?

My original idea for this was "My Ash Tray is Burnt" but then it turns out that Miss Kate is Australian and, just like I do every day, pronounces "last" to rhyme with...huh, can't find a single word that would rhyme in an American accent. Uh...like the middle syllable of "andante", there we go. So my whole plan went right down the bog.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 1

Voting Breakdown

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   1
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User Comments

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Agrimorfee - September 27, 2018 - Report this comment
Your Andante was fortissimo con brio!

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