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Song Parodies -> "You're Pitiful"

Original Song Title:

"You're Beautiful"

Original Performer:

James Blunt

Parody Song Title:

"You're Pitiful"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

S.T.G. already turned Christina Aguilera's "Beautiful" into "Pitiful," but that was directed at Christina herself. I realize that James Blunt is so wimpy he makes Peter Frampton look and sound like Ronnie Van Zant, but this is not directed at him. (Nicole Parker's hilarious "I'm Beautiful" on "Mad TV" will have to suffice.) Who is it directed at? Take a wild guess.
Bill Clinton's brilliant.

Bill Clinton's brilliant.
Al Gore is pure.
John Kerry's so brave.
All these are sure.

The Daily News on the subway.
I read about that stupid man.
And I've lost too much sleep on that.
He's got lousy plans.

You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
Lie to my face!
You're such disgrace!
And I don't know what to do
'cause 'til '09, stuck with you!

Yes, I caught his lie.
Good luck has passed him by.
I could see from his policies he
must be high.
Soon he will be screwing up again
but it's three more years of him 'til the end.

You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
George Dubya Bush!
Come kiss my tush!
'Cause you don't know what to do!
And 'til '09, stuck with you!

(instrumental break)

You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!
You're pitiful!

There must be an angel
with a smile on her face
who'll send someone who'll guide us through.
But it's time to face the truth:
We should never side with you.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.7
How Funny: 3.5
Overall Rating: 3.3

Total Votes: 30

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   5
 2   3
 3   2
 4   6
 5   14

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Lurker - March 24, 2006 - Report this comment
I apologize to Michael Pacholek, John Barry, and everyone else here. I realize that free speech is what separates us from Communists, Nazis, etc. I enjoy using my right of free speech here. I will start showing the same respect for others too. I hope I can be forgiven.
Michael Pacholek - March 24, 2006 - Report this comment
We'll see. We've already seen I'm not the only one to think of this title. Looks like a tie.
Shiek Of The Mutilated - March 24, 2006 - Report this comment
Although I still can't agree with your first three lines, Georgie Boy has proven to be the worst by far. Keep it up, Michael.
thayer - March 24, 2006 - Report this comment
Your opinions are a dime a dozen. Originality, please!
LucidLupin LeeBee - March 25, 2006 - Report this comment
It can't be reiterated enough! 5s
Larry Hensley - March 26, 2006 - Report this comment
So true, 555s
Linda - March 26, 2006 - Report this comment
Oh gad! ------- Yet another brilliant song from the brilliant mind of Michael, the boy who must include big boy words like "stupid" and "dumb" in all of his remedial parodies, (and is so naive to actually believe they are good and believe the left wing radical's opinions count!) That's funny! In fact it’s the funniest part of your parodies! -- -- The best part of this one was the jests, "Gore is pure" "Kerry is so brave" and "Clinton Brilliant" - classic comedy! I would have phrased it differently though... more like --- -- Clinton's clamant -- Al Gore's manure -- John Kerry's so depraved -- To these no cure - -- - But that's not too nice for me to say, considering you have a handicap and all & I write so much better than you do! -- So never mind
Linda - March 26, 2006 - Report this comment
PS The title tie was cute, only the other guy's parody didn' t suck so much like yours, sorry, no tie, he wins!
aunt egbert - March 26, 2006 - Report this comment
its really funny , JB is so overated. his voice actually sounds like its breaking. the best ' ur beautiful' parody is 'ur gullible' though
Michael Pacholek - March 26, 2006 - Report this comment
OK, Linda, you want big words? How about "moronic." How about "intellectually impaired." See, I use simple words for simple people like you and Georgie. As for Thayer, all I can say is my Bush parodies continue to be original, because the bum keeps giving me new material to reinforce what is already obvious: He's a stupid right-wing fanatic who uses lies to back up his prejudices, and he's harming this country in ways most of us couldn't imagine in 2000, and about 51 percent of us couldn't imagine in 2004. I'm proud to have been part of the 51 percent of 2000 and the 49 percent of 2004 -- and the 67 percent of 2006!
And how come... - March 26, 2006 - Report this comment
Linda always has to have two comments at once trashing my parodies and my politics? I guess she isn't good enough to cram 'em all in at one shot.
Linda - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Hmmm… first, I find it funny that you used a second post to complain about my posting more than once! And I certainly do not know what your last sentence means, “I guess she isn’t good enough to cram ‘em all in at one shot.” I don’t think it’s a matter of ‘good enough’, but what ever floats your confused little boat! --- - I never asked you to use ‘big words’ as you imply. I simply stated a fact, one that can be backed up by anyone who reads though your “parodies” " you use the same words, over and over and over again, (that is what redundant means). And really, do you honestly think “moronic” is a big word? ---- -- And brownie points for you, Michael, you felt it necessary to prove you can use big words, but did not direct them as they were not intended for anyone or anything special as written and to that I say, “good job”. You actually DO know more than ‘stupid’ and ‘dumb’ even though they are the clear favourites in your arsenal of ‘at hand’ words! Sadly, you blew it all over again in your ranting reply when you jumped right back into your impressive “he’s stupid’ lingo. ---- -- Your parodies regarding President Bush, (even if you say it’s not true), are really NOT original no matter how much new material your desperate to win party tells you is true and verifiable. I do not see the ‘fanatic’ or the ‘lies to back up his prejudices’, I think you are beyond extremists and to the point of no return in your fanatical crazed hate, your blinded to reality partisan thinking and your pride has eaten up what was left of any realism, common sense and perspective you may have had. ---- -- Judging by your run-on sentence, you are obviously an angry young fellow, allowing a party that is more desperate than “you apparently know” to feed you some awfully misguided information. If you do not think that they would NOT sell your soul to the devil and kill their own mothers for a win, you are sadly mistaken. I can safely and with the utmost of honesty and true say that what you believe at this moment in time, is severely tarnished, completely misguided, very partisan, and not factual. I can, with all honesty, say that you have flipped your wiring and left the planet with your thinking. I can say that you are living in a miserable world created (on purpose) by your own party, who really do not care if you or anyone else is miserable in their hate toward our president " completely miserable day in and day out! The fact is, they want it that way, like it that way and lie through their nasty teeth to keep it that way! I have reality and facts on my side; you have hype and hate and are led and fed by some black herders!
Linda - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
cont... ---- -- I do not know what you thought to gain by posting your “proud to have” lines, that’s curious! Are you attempting to gloat again, like you did when you bragged about being a member of the horribly wrong ACLU " backers of men who love boys clubs, the rights of communists and those who rape and murder our children? Again, what ever floats your boat! You have all sorts of pride and frankly, I would not think you needed to list them, least of all your pride for voting for a total loon and a self-proclaimed war criminal coward! ---- -- Finally, you post as if you are a victim and I “always” comment on your ‘attempts’ at political parody humour/works. You should know that "that statement is untrue Michael. In fact, I believe that you have commented on and trashed/bashed many more of my parodies than I have yours! You even come in to bash non-political parodies I write, (part of your feeling threatened by me). I suppose that I will remain the ‘better person’ who can be impartial and sane (and really, next to you most people are sane). I gave you constructive criticism, which is much more than I could say about any of your comments. None of them were constructive, none helpful, just all bashing and saying they are not good enough, (as if this site is a place where genius parody writers come, those who are required to live up to Michael’s standards). I think it would be easy for most people to live up to your sorry examples and surpass them on the first or second try! Most are not so horribly redundant and vocabulary starved! ---- -- My comment was true, is true and it seems as if you will continue to make it true… your political parodies are juvenile, immature, redundant and their vocabulary has a lot to be desired! How many pieces can one do with the words “stupid” and “dumb” repeated with a 5th grade theme and still say they are unique, fresh and growing in technique and style? You have not evolved to the next level (sixth grade), since I first came here and read your silly songs. You want to stay stuck in the style, stuck in the immaturity, stuck on hate and misery, (not to mention stuck on yourself), far be it for me to try to help you see the truth. You place all your eggs of esteem in this one site’s basket and thrive on the false praises and false glory of a few fellow fanatics, and that is sad. But those with seemingly allergic reactions to the truth, like you, are lost cases anyway.
Michael Pacholek - March 27, 2006 - Report this comment
Whose point has been proven here? Beam me up, Scotty, there's no intelligent life down here. I'll continue to call Bush stupid as long as he insists upon doing things I know to be stupid. "Sixth grade"? How would you know what the seventh grade looks like? And "a few fellow fanatics" is all Bush has left. He's at 33 percent. Two-thirds of Americans now see through him. You don't get below 40 percent just by losing independents and ticket-splitters. You get them by losing some of your own people. Do yourself a favor: Go see "V for Vendetta," and maybe you'll get a clue. But you won't. You'll probably, instead, go to a fourth viewing of "Larry the Cable Guy." It's more to your -- pardon the choice of words -- taste.
Joel Martinez - March 28, 2006 - Report this comment
DANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ya'll need to chill with the comments!
Linda - April 05, 2006 - Report this comment
TO MICHAEL (THE TOTAL BLOW HARD); Y --- -- You never really address anything I say, like when I just gave you point blank facts on issues, such as the economy, that made you look like an ignorant twit (not to mention a liar who makes things up). And speaking about mentality and egocentric imps, the “Beam me up” line proves two of my points; you are an immature egotistical blowhard! You always run from the facts when you are caught lying, always! You just disappear all together, what a crock of crap you are! If you want to call others “stupid” consistently using that word and “dumb” over and over in huge amounts of your parodies, far be it for me to comment on your weaknesses, horrid parody vocabulary and total immaturity. You just continue on thinking they are something special and those comments from your ignorant extremist pals here are actually valid and honest! (You are not one for reality and truth anyway) - ---- --- I think you forgot the popularity of your own idol, playboy Clinton, the man who ran from Bin on two occasions when he got him handed to him on a sliver platter by the Saudis and our own CIA! (And after we were attacked 4 times by Bin AND Bin had declaired war) ----- ---- --- Nevertheless, when people as a whole are flooded with bullshyt information that is drilled into their heads, they tend to believe what they hear. I am confident that the majority of people are ignorant of the facts, the truth and the reality that is not being shown to them and they believe things that have been proven false LONG AGO. This is because that is exactly what your DESPERATE party has driven into their heads. It takes more smarts and a considerable amount of effort to look for the truth and facts than it does watching TV and listening to left wing desperate wackos like you! Most do not have the desire or the time to do so, (like you, who are constantly being shown you are wrong with REAL facts to back it up!) It’s no real mystery, even you are unaware of facts and when faced with them, you ignore them completely. You have been shown without a doubt to be a liar who actually makes up his own facts! I call that un-intelligent, so I am afraid Scotty cannot beam your arse up, you are a blowhard, a liar, and run from the truth as a habit and way of life, (even if you present yourself to be some smart clued in person, which is laughable to say the least!). It takes no effort at all to be a sheep like yourself and believe everything you are told to believe, no matter how crazed it is! It does however take effort and a need for truth and reality to be a leader - something you apparently will never be!
Sean Lee (non-asian) - May 02, 2006 - Report this comment
I have nothing against Bush, but I love to make fun of him 555
Anny - June 05, 2006 - Report this comment
To Michael, I think ur songs are great, this parody is especially intelligent and witty :) Good job. And to Linda, bite your tongue. You go on and on about nothing. Wth do you have against Michael? Think before you blurt out a bunch of crap.
Sam Hill - June 13, 2006 - Report this comment
I have to agree with Linda. JP's parody is not original in that just about everyone thinks and has pointed out that George Bush is an idiot. Personally, i don't tire of it.
Silver Power - June 21, 2006 - Report this comment
555, because I agree with this song. He is pitiful. Linda, is obviously a republican, an ass kisser, and single. Go yell at your boss down at Hooter's, Linda. You don't gotta yell at Mike up here. Mike's probably just doing what his mom told him, an what my mom told me: "Don't Lie."

Linda should start going out with me. She seems to love rednecks.

TJ out...Silver out...Whatever.
Chris H. - July 13, 2006 - Report this comment
Luckily . it won't be `09 , it will be `08. Jackass
Truth - July 17, 2006 - Report this comment
Wow! Linda is a propagandist extraordinaire (if that is your real name, which it is not)! Hope Karl Rove pays you well to pretend that you are a regular person backing the Nazi, I mean Republican Party! Don't believe that drivel, people! Good parody, Michael!
Random Religious African Woman - July 21, 2006 - Report this comment
Oh Puh-Raise The Lowd!
robbie - November 06, 2007 - Report this comment
that was great

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