Where's my mic?
Hope I didn't drop it on my floor - there it is
Here... we go

Have you ever been yelled at for having created a mess
I have; but it never really caused me a whole lot of stress
Peopled glared and their tempers flared, and they would shout
But there's no doubt that they had the common sense to stay out
Of my messy room unless doom sounds like a good thing to their brain
And everyone who's not dumb from going there they refrain
Well I can go in there because after all the room belongs to me
And if I never went in there I don't know where I would sleep
Jump on my bed from the hall although I've been told not to
So I don't trip you see, the fact is that I have got to
Wanted to yell, therefore you went into the neat freak's hell that's right momma
And it seems you are not feeling so well

Chorus:

I'm sorry momma
I never meant to hurt you
At least you didn't break your spine; and tonight
I'm cleaning up my carpet (or I'll try)
I said I'm sorry momma
I never meant to hurt you
At least you didn't break your spine; and tonight
I'm cleaning up my carpet

Ha! If I had skeletons on my carpet
Well they would be completely hidden
By all the stuff that makes going in my room forbidden
I am not kiddin'; I'll take you back to '84
The last time a vacuum ever got anywhere close to my floor
I was a baby, and I won a quite difficult battle
To keep my baby toys like well I think I had a rattle
And my floor, it houses each toy that I ever outgrew
And each pair of shoes I had since I had since I was three or maybe two
And absolutely, completely bad pictures that I once drew
And some books by Doctor Seuss like one 'bout Solla Sallew
Tests and papers I bombed and others that I aced
Numbers I used when I raced
And print-out lyric sheets used for parodies on my floor were placed
Some stuff in there makes it quite easy to fall
And there's no doubt in my mind there's useful stuff underneath it all
Some of the stuff there; about it I do not want to know
It's my room; I'd like to welcome y'all to "the messy mess show"

Chorus

Now I think that you should have known, momma, not to cross the border
Into this here room which does not have a single semblance of order
If the mess had been cleaned when shorter, then my old recorder
Would not have been there to trip you and force me to fetch you water
But you can't sue me that's right momma not even for a quarter
Because I am handicapped, mom, victim of lazy disorder
Well maybe that is not a truly legitimate impairment
And it's not great, you're in a state, of cannot-get-up-from-there-ment
My parent, you don't really want to take me in front of the judge, ma
You don't want me to acquire a never ending grudge, ma
And besides, like someone who jumped in a bullring and got gored
And tried to sue the management your lawsuit's gonna be ignored
If you do get me into court; the judge will say, to you "tsk tsk
You should have known that you went into the room at your own risk
Well what hurts you the most is your dislocated shoulder
But I'm no doc, maybe I'll be one when I am older
On what's really aggravating you you have put a new name
Yeah now you claim, it's that I am playing my video game
You keep saying I'm a bum and should go find something to do
Well I have found something - I'm doing more than you

Chorus 2x