(CHORUS)
I've seen so many faces,
I've been to many places;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9
He's been to insane mountain,
More than twice as he's lost counting;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9

My day, has finally come,
Like a nuclear missile with targets locked on,
You might read this and think 'this is crap',
But you've just said what I called my rap!
I'm the crap-rap king, and I get,
E-Mailed by 6 people,
and 5 are sent,
Oh man,
I Backfired the plan,
Hit me with a pan,
Or one of those metal tin cans.
You know, I wanna consummate,
On my wedding night, just to lose some weight;
I wanna remind you all I'm only fifteen,
Incase some bizarre stuff starts happening;
I dance, dance, c'mon dance!
(car drives past)
I SAID C'MON DANCE!
Everybody in the halls, you better start to prance,
As its the last to start a new romance;
I don't mess-up and you can ask around,
I prefer the indoors than going in town;
Man, I don't wanna go out,
I wanna sit indoors, become a larger lout...

Wait a sec, what the hell am I on?
I'm 15 and I act like my life's just gone,
and a bomb's just gone and killed many leprechauns,
Man I'm cracking up as my brain has gone.
I think I had some cheese, and it's killing me please,
I think I'm John Cleese,
And I'm probably numb,
DUMB! DUMB! I'm just one,
Of those British Teens that like to flap their tongue.
Phew, guy, it was a false alarm,
I think I was just looking for some attention,
So I'll stop acting stupid,
Like I'm high,
On some sugar or I'll buy,
A new nuke pit,
I think this verse is long,
I've got my parody wrong,
But now it's for us,
To hear out...THE CHORUS!

(CHORUS)
I've seen so many faces,
I've been to many places;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9
He's been to insane mountain,
More than twice as he's lost counting;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9

(HOOK)
Xander Three Nines
Blow up landmines,
I ain't sexy,
Ladies hate me,
What on Earth is a baby mother?
If I don't know, we can't hate each other,
They probably wanna go out, get hungry and then eat each other,
Something, something, something, something, something, something,
I DON'T KNOW!

Spoof songs,
Songs I spoof,
Spoof two songs,
On the streets I walk,
In the UK where the paths are chalk,
I thought it Incredible you can buy in Bulk,
I need to go away,
By myself for days,
Til my brain goes back on a saney day,
Until I'm old and gray,
And I'm an old blokey-doke,
I reminisce,
When I used to play for days...
*COUGH COUGH COUGH*
All this pollution smoke!
Had an accident when the factory broke,
Ahh, Poor Lady,
Got no baby,
So I go and call child support?
(I'm crazy!)

I go and do four things at one time,
I lose concentration when I'm doing mine,
(You on about Homework?)
Do I lie back?
I can't think of rhymes,
If I don't do that.
Why the hell do you think I parody?
Just for the fun and not to make money.
If you've got parodies,
Then show me please,
I like a good laugh too.
I don't give a damm if they're about me or you.
Games, Stars, or crappy game shows,
Even spoof about some decent shows,
I've just thought some and I gonna write now...


(CHORUS)
I've seen so many faces,
I've been to many places;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9
He's been to insane mountain,
More than twice as he's lost counting;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9

It's near the end,
I have no friends,
In the parody world.
Can pick up girls, I'm too young,
And I smell like Twirl.
Song rapping, Parodying, very funny guy,
Rap songs, cheesy pop songs,
Wanna Try?
X, 9-9-9,
Got Xander acting fine,
Song funny, (yeah right)
Girl, I'm for real!
So sit back to the end of this song,
As I've proved I've done no wrong,
I've seen it and if you haven't,
XANDER'S THE NEW TALENT!

(CHORUS)
I've seen so many faces,
I've been to many places;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9
He's been to insane mountain,
More than twice as he's lost counting;
But nothing compares
To Xander 9-9-9

(HOOK)
Xander Three Nines
Blow up landmines,
I ain't sexy,
Ladies hate me,
What on Earth is a baby mother?
If I don't know, we can't hate each other,
They probably wanna go out, get hungry and then eat each other,
Something, something, something, something, something, something,
I DON'T KNOW!

(HARMONICA SOLO...)