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Song Parodies -> "Valentine's"

Original Song Title:

"Everytime"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Britney Spears

Parody Song Title:

"Valentine's"

Parody Written by:

Nib Oswald

The Lyrics

Dinner, gifts, romantic activities... sounds like the perfect Valentine's Day!
Rose has bees,
Cake is bland.
Hired a chaise,
Got a van.
The doves went wrong.
I'll turn the fan off next time.

Valentine's awry, you cry and bawl.
Your pouncet stinks, pups need air holes.
I messed up, seemed a melee.
This Valentine's has teemed, terrified screams.
Chemise of lace went up in flames.
A mass of steaming debris.

Nooo!

Silk handkerchief,
Perfumed with myrrh.
You've allergies?
Diarrheoa
Bought stale Bourgogne.
A stream of spew, you're queasy.

Valentines's awry, you cry and bawl.
The flower stings, the meal is cold.
I messed up, seemed a melee.
This Valentines has teemed, horrified screams.
As we are chased by swans upstream.
A mass of steaming debris.

This day is plain insane.
Razed your chimney.
The strippers are all dames,
Paid for chocolate fungi.

Nooo!

A frightful day.
Burns Unit, they'll soon operate.

Valentines's awry, you cry and bawl.
You're now in splints, your weals look sore.
White plaster sheaths your body.
This Valentines has teemed, petrified screams.
Next holiday, a daunting scheme.
I'll pass on Easter, lady.

Aargh, aargh!
Aargh, aargh!
Aargh, aargh!

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Ashkicksass - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Well...it's the thought that counts...
Stuart McArthur - February 14, 2005 - Report this comment
I've read 3 Valentines day parodies today, covering lonely Nerds wanking, J.W.Bobbit, bonking sex-dolls, and being incinerated

no schmoopies at Amiright

555 Luke - nice wordplay
EmiLoca - February 15, 2005 - Report this comment
This was absolutely brilliant. You made it hilariously funny without making it too over-the-top, so we could recognize that mournful, melancholy feeling that Britney tried so hard to get in the first place (making it all the more hilarious). What the hell is Diarrheoa? 5-5-5!
Jeff Reuben - February 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Well done. I haven't had a Valentine's Day that bad in weeks!
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - February 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Diarrhoea? Hmm, it's the maple syrup to one's maple glaze. Thanks Ash, Stu, Emi and Jeff!
Arwen - February 17, 2005 - Report this comment
I don't know how I missed this one before...this is FAB, Luke...and surprisingly familiar...; )
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - February 17, 2005 - Report this comment
You were in a coma. I forgive you.

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