All the evil fingernails, all the evil fingernails
All the evil fingernails, all the evil fingernails
All the evil fingernails, all the evil fingernails
All the evil fingernails

Now put your feet down
Down near my butt, I might far up up
I'm doing my own crazy dance
Decided to dance and now you change your pants
'Cause another sister bit my arm

I'm smelling her, she's licking me
Don't pay her any more money
Just handled my fears, through five great beers
And I can barely see

Cause if you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Don't be angry if you see the back of my head
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Oh, oh, oh

Cause if you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Don't be angry if you see the back of my head
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed

I got moss on my toes, some snot up my nose
Got a lighter in my blue jeans
Pretending to be drunk, just water in my cup
I can care less if you're a leprechaun

I need a permission slip, did I mention
Don't pay the bus driver any attention
'Cause you had you forgot to clip and now you hurt your hip
Not to mention scratching me

Cause if you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Don't be angry if you see the back of my head
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Oh, oh, oh

Cause if you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Don't be angry if you see the back of my head
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Oh, oh, oh

Don't tickle my insides I might hurl
I'm a boy and not a girl
Your attention is what I need, what I crave

Here's a monkey that won't cut his nails
And delivers pizza to my door, to Buzz Lightyear's home
Pull me over if I'm drunk, say you're the dog I own
If you don't, you'll have to go home
And like a ball I'll roll down the street

All the evil fingernails, all the evil fingernails
All the evil fingernails, all the evil fingernails
All the evil fingernails, all the evil fingernails
All the evil fingernails
Now put your arms down, oh, oh, oh

Cause if you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Don't be angry if you see the back of my head
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Oh, oh, oh

Cause if you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Don't be angry if you see the back of my head
If you were crazy you shoulda gone to bed
Oh, oh, oh