Fell off this wall and I broke my spine
All the King’s Men arrived
They grabbed their blades and struck up a blaze
They didn’t bring the pa-a-a-aste

So now I am cracked up
Although the joke is at my expense
They plan to stuff their face with me
The dish and spoon met their lips

I’m scrambled egg
I’m scrambled egg…
I’m scrambled egg
Now scram… Scrambled egg!

(Mother)
Goose please help me
I’m Humpty Dumpty!!!
(Off the wall)
That meant my death
Was ‘Over Easy’

The Queen of Hearts made tarts
You can eat, now get me glue!
And Jack Sprat can’t eat fat (And eggs!)
His wife however che-e-e-ews

They’ve got me grilled and fried
And sunny-side up with Swiss cheese
They wouldn’t see the Muffin Man cause
They had to quench their need for eggs!

Now I’m in pain
Now I’m in pain
Now I’m in pain
Now I’m… In Much Pain!!!

(Hunger)
The yolks on you
Cause I taste yucky!
(My great fall)
Was egg-cellent
It was quite smashing!
(With salad dressing)
That crack in me
Was worth repairing!!!
(Fell off the wall)
All the King’s Men
Are eggnog thirsty!

[Peter Piper drops the pipe and starts rocking out on the electric guitar]

Little Miss Muffet
Hates curds and whey
(Curds and whey)
The spider won’t bug
Her while she eats the egg
All three blind mice
To cheddar said, “So long”
Cause pickled eggs are nice
(Taste is so nice)

I’m scrambled egg
I’m scrambled egg… (Bwa ha ha ha ha!!!)
I’m scrambled egg
I’m scram… Scrambled egg!!!

(Farmer)
Who’s in the dell
Had chickens lay me
(Now I’m sprawled)
In every gut
Jack and Jill bit me
(I’m served at luncheons)
Even Bo Peep
Had her sheep eat me
(Was cursed and fell)
Tell your children
The true-life story