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Misheard Song Lyrics -> Stories -> Paul Simon
Misheard lyrics (also called mondegreens) occur when people misunderstand the lyrics in a song. These are NOT intentional rephrasing of lyrics, which is called parody. For more information about the misheard lyrics available on this site, please read our FAQ.
This page contains a list of the songs that have stories about their misheard lyrics submitted.
Song names are sorted by first letter, excluding A and The. This is sorted by song title only, not by song title and performer. So if two different performers preformed the same song, you'll see misheard lyrics for both on the same page (provided the song title was spelt the same both times, and misheard lyrics have been submitted for both!).
Graceland album at Amazon.com
Paul Simon's, "50 Ways To Leave Your Lover"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to kiss my butt
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
You don't need to kiss my butt
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
The Real Lyrics:
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
You don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free
The Story: I already mistook the line containing "coy, Roy" as "courderoy" as in the type of pants and Courderoy Bear children's books I knew in school. I was going to make more mishearing mistakes on this one. Hey, I was only about 8 or 9 years old! - Submitted by: Pizza Coot
Paul Simon's, "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Don't have to be corduroy.
The Real Lyrics:
Don't have to be coy Roy.
The Story: It's crazy I misheard it all these years. - Submitted by: Matthew
Paul Simon's, "50 Ways to Leave Your Lover"
The Misheard Lyrics:
You don’t need a Poloroid
The Real Lyrics:
You don’t need to be coy, Roy
The Story: Ever since “Kodachrome”, he could have been talking about cameras all his life. - Submitted by: Cody Finke
Paul Simon's, "Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Turn a banana
The Real Lyrics:
Ta na na na na
The Story: Every time I hear it it’s, “turn a banana, turn a banana”. - Submitted by: Stan Mason
Paul Simon's, "Graceland"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Graceland, Graceland, breakfast in the sea
The Real Lyrics:
Graceland, Graceland, Memphis Tennessee
The Story: Misheard in my childhood - Submitted by: Ben Kent
Paul Simon's, "Graceland"
The Misheard Lyrics:
The way she brushed her hair and farted
The Real Lyrics:
The way she brushed her hair from her forehead
The Story: My husband at the time swore that it was about farting because a few lines later it says “everybody sees the wind blow”. 🤣 But every time I hear this song I still hear “farted” and it makes me giggle. - Submitted by: Linda
Paul Simon's, "Graceland"
The Misheard Lyrics:
The way she brushed her hair was foreign.
The Real Lyrics:
The way she brushed her hair from her forehead.
The Story: I was convinced I was right, then I saw the other misheards for this lyric, and thought 'Hey, what they've got written down for the real lyric is wrong!' So I went and checked my CD case, and sure enough... - Submitted by: Sarah
Paul Simon's, "I Know What I Know"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Who am I to glow against the moon?
The Real Lyrics:
Who am I to blow against the wind?
The Story: I was honestly pretty sure that's what he was saying. Never mind that it makes no sense. - Submitted by: Joe Strickland
Paul Simon's, "Kodachrome"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I got a nice old camera
The Real Lyrics:
I got a Nikon camera.
The Story: It wasn't me it was my neighbor/friend. - Submitted by: Rob
Paul Simon's, "Kodachrome"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I've got a nice contender
I wanna take him for a ride
I wanna take him for a ride
The Real Lyrics:
I've got a Nikon camera
I love to take a photograph
I love to take a photograph
The Story: Until today, I never knew the right words. Wow, I'm surprised it's about a camera!! - Submitted by: Julie B
Paul Simon's, "Kodachrome"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Mama don't take my country home
Mama don't take my country home
Mama don't take my country homeaway.
Mama don't take my country home
Mama don't take my country homeaway.
The Real Lyrics:
Mama don't take my Kodachrome
Mama don't take my Kodachrome
Mama don't take my Kodachrome away.
Mama don't take my Kodachrome
Mama don't take my Kodachrome away.
The Story: Until I was in my 20's, I thought this was called and about someone's Mama taking their country home away. I was looking at a Paul Simon Greatest Hit cd a friend of mine had purchased and said I had never heard of Kodachrome. He said we just heard it. I told him that it was Country Home. So he played it for me - several times - before I actually got Kodachrome. Guess I never paid attention to the words growing up. - Submitted by: Kimberly HIcks
Paul Simon's, "Kodachrome"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Mama don't throw my Gold Comb away
The Real Lyrics:
So mama don't take my Kodachrome away
The Story: I have heard this song hundreds of times, and I always thought I heard him say "Mama don't throw my gold comb away." - Submitted by: Nettie Guiliana
Paul Simon's, "Kodachrome"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Mamma don't take my motor home away.
The Real Lyrics:
Mamma don't take my Kodachrome away.
The Story: My boyfriend and I were in the car after I listened to some Paul Simon and Simon and Garfunkel at home. He started humming the tune of the song; and pretty soon, he's going, 'Mamma don't take my motor home, mamma don't take my motor home away.' I nearly peed my pants laughing! - Submitted by: Tonya
Paul Simon's, "Kodachrome"
The Misheard Lyrics:
When I think back on all the drugs
I did in high school,
It's a wonder I can think at all.
I did in high school,
It's a wonder I can think at all.
The Real Lyrics:
When I think back on all the things
I learned in high school,
It's a wonder I can think at all.
I learned in high school,
It's a wonder I can think at all.
The Story: This was misheard by an ex-husband, who unfortunately did all of those drugs. Like some others, he insisted on the homegrown lyric, claiming that this was a drug song, not about taking pictures with a camera. - Submitted by: Peggy Schmidt
Paul Simon's, "Kodaxhrone"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Momma, don't take my homegrown, Momma, don't take my homegrown, Momma, don't take my homegrown away Leave my pot all alone Momma, don't take my homegrown away
The Real Lyrics:
Mama don't take my Kodachrome Mama don't take my Kodachrome Mama don't take my Kodachrome away Mama don't take my Kodachrome Leave your boy so far from home Mama don't take my Kodachrome away Mama don't take my Kodachrome Mama don't take my Kodachrome away
The Story: I was smoking homegrown...? I'm sorta deaf? I swear, I thought those were the words until I turned 35... - Submitted by: Mari
Paul Simon's, "Loves Me Like A Rock"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I'm a constipated board.
The Real Lyrics:
I'm a consecrated boy.
The Story: My five-year old sister randomly sang this version out loud in the grocery store. - Submitted by: Jillian
Paul Simon's, "Loves Me Like a Rock"
The Misheard Lyrics:
She kicked me on the knee and hurt me
The Real Lyrics:
She get down on her knees and hug me
The Story: This was the way my ex-wife used to sing it for the longest time. She actually believed these were the words. We always had debates over it for years until the Internet came about. Then it was easy to find the true words. - Submitted by: Chris
Paul Simon's, "Me and Julio Down By the Schoolyard"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Me and Coolio down by the school lawn
The Real Lyrics:
Me and Julio down by the schoolyard
The Story: I really wondered by that word "Schoolyard", and hearing this song, I would know better that even though Coolio was alive by then, rap wasn't a common fad. - Submitted by: Cody Finke
Paul Simon's, "Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Me and Coolio down by the schoolyard
The Real Lyrics:
Me and Julio down by the schoolyard
The Story: Like anybody who genuinely loves music, I stay away from Gangsta rap like the plague. But I do know there is a rapper named Coolio, even though I have no idea what he sounds like and don't care either (how do people tell them apart, anyway?). And his name reminds me of the Julio of this song. So here it is. - Submitted by: Jeffrey
Paul Simon's, "Me and Julio Down by the Schoolyard"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Me and Julia down by the schoolyard
The Real Lyrics:
Me and Julio down by the schoolyard
The Story: Heard this recently in the Secret Life of Pets 2. - Submitted by: Cody Finke
Paul Simon's, "Mother And Child Reunion"
The Misheard Lyrics:
But a mother and child reunion, is only emotional rape
The Real Lyrics:
But a mother and child reunion
Is only a motion away
Is only a motion away
The Story: When I misheard this, I thought that Paul Simon was being really heavy and psychological. - Submitted by: Joe Huang
Paul Simon's, "Mother And Child Reunion"
The Misheard Lyrics:
No, I would not give you false hope
On the Strait or Morecambe Bay But a mother and child reunion
Is only a motion away
On the Strait or Morecambe Bay But a mother and child reunion
Is only a motion away
The Real Lyrics:
No, I would not give you false hope
On this strange and mournful day But a mother and child reunion
Is only a motion away
On this strange and mournful day But a mother and child reunion
Is only a motion away
The Story: I may have heard that 'Homeward Bound' was written in Widnes in north-east England, so thought it was logical that Paul Simon might refer to the region again in another song. - Submitted by: Robert Sissons
Paul Simon's, "Mother and Child Reunion"
The Misheard Lyrics:
For I would not give you false hope, on this strange and lonesome day
The Real Lyrics:
No I would not give you false hope, on this strange and mournful day
The Story: It does sound like "lonesome", and it's kind of a sad song anyway. - Submitted by: Panda Rosa
Paul Simon's, "Mother and Child Reunion"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I know they said the letter B
The Real Lyrics:
I know they said "Let it be"
The Story: Paul Simon, post-Garfunkel, had anything to do with the Beatles? - Submitted by: Cody Finke
Paul Simon's, "Mother and Child Reunion"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I've never been laid so low.
Such unsteering sway
In the course of a lifetime runs
Over and over again
Such unsteering sway
In the course of a lifetime runs
Over and over again
The Real Lyrics:
I've never been laid so low
In such a mysterious way.
And the course of a lifetime runs
Over and over again
In such a mysterious way.
And the course of a lifetime runs
Over and over again
The Story: The misheard phrase was a line I really liked. When I found out the real lyrics I wrote a (respectful) letter to Paul Simon telling him about it, and that I kind of liked the misheard lines better. I doubt he agreed. :-) - Submitted by: Robert Adair
Paul Simon's, "Slip Slidin' Away"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Hokum boleration
The more you're slip slidin' away.
The more you're slip slidin' away.
The Real Lyrics:
You know the nearer your destination
The more you're slip slidin' away.
The more you're slip slidin' away.
The Story: I thought this line was made up nonsensical words like Lennon sometimes used to do in his songs. I'm blessed with a pretty good voice and in a car with a group of 4 or 5 friends I was singing along to the radio quite loudly to this song. When I came out with "Hokum boleration", everyone burst out laughing. It still sounds like that to me, though. - Submitted by: zigzag
Paul Simon's, "Slip Slidin' Away"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Slip slide in the rain
Slip slide in the rain
You know the nearer your destination
The more you slip slide in the rain.
Slip slide in the rain
You know the nearer your destination
The more you slip slide in the rain.
The Real Lyrics:
Slip slidin' away
Slip slidin' away
You know the nearer your destination
The more you're slip slidin' away.
Slip slidin' away
You know the nearer your destination
The more you're slip slidin' away.
The Story: When I looked up the lyrics on another website, I was surprized to find: A) that it was a Paul Simon work, and, B) that it was composed in the late '70s. I had always assumed it to be an early-'70s C&W hit of the 'Skip-A-Rope' variety. But I'm a classical music fan, so I tend to be out of the loop on pop music. - Submitted by: 360decrees
Paul Simon's, "Slip Slidin' Away"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Slip slide in the rain
Slip slide in the rain
You know the nearer your destination
The more you slip slide in the rain.
Slip slide in the rain
You know the nearer your destination
The more you slip slide in the rain.
The Real Lyrics:
Slip slidin' away
Slip slidin' away
You know the nearer your destination
The more you're slip slidin' away.
Slip slidin' away
You know the nearer your destination
The more you're slip slidin' away.
The Story: Before looking the lyrics up I had no idea that this was a late '70s Paul Simon song. I assumed it was a late '60s or early '70s country & western number in the 'Skip A Rope' vein. - Submitted by: Priceless Provost
Paul Simon's, "You Can Call Me Al"
The Misheard Lyrics:
Anyway you call me, you can call me out
The Real Lyrics:
Betty when you call me you can call me Al
The Story: Also thought the song was called 'Call Me Out' - Submitted by: Bad ears
Paul Simon's, "You Can Call Me Al"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I can call you Betty
And Betty, when you call me
You can call me now - call me now!
And Betty, when you call me
You can call me now - call me now!
The Real Lyrics:
I can call you Betty
And Betty, when you call me
You can call me Al - call me Al.
And Betty, when you call me
You can call me Al - call me Al.
The Story: Suffice it to say that I never saw the title of this song, and thought the guy was just impatient for the girl to make the first move. My college roommate never let me hear the end of it after she corrected the misheard version that I was singing at the top of my lungs. - Submitted by: Bekah
Paul Simon's, "You Can Call Me Al"
The Misheard Lyrics:
I can call you Biggie
or
I can call you Diddy
or
I can call you Diddy
The Real Lyrics:
I can call you Betty
The Story: I used to think it was a reference to rappers. - Submitted by: Cody Finke
Paul Simon's, "You Can Call Me Al"
The Misheard Lyrics:
With some roly-poly little bout-faced girl.
The Real Lyrics:
With some roly-poly little bat-faced girl
The Story: This is a term my mother would use to describe round faced people. - Submitted by: Mike
Paul Simon's, "You Can Call Me Al"
The Misheard Lyrics:
[They're] saying infinity He says eight
The Real Lyrics:
Spinning in infinity He says Amen
The Story: You know when you're a little kid, you have a big imagination, and you conjure up these images? I imagined this guy was arguing with a group of people about a symbol written on a mysterious piece of paper, and they said the symbol was infinity, and he turned it sideways and said '8!' - Submitted by: Lunkhins
Paul Simon's, "You Can Call Me Al"
The Misheard Lyrics:
bat-faced girl
The Real Lyrics:
bap-faced girl
The Story: I over heard somone sing "bat-faced girl" and looked online. Most every site lists the lyric as bat-faced. It is bap-faced, which means round faced, as in roly poly. - Submitted by: Donna
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