Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Christmas Tree Soliloquy"

Original Song Title:

"To Be, Or Not To Be"

Original Performer:

William Shakespeare: Hamlet

Parody Song Title:

"Christmas Tree Soliloquy"

Parody Written by:

Warren Baker

The Lyrics

Had a discussion recently with some friends about how quickly people tend to put away their Christmas decorations and toss their tree. To me it seemed tragic.
Hence, the Hamlet.
To keep, or not to keep—that is the question
Whether tis nobler in the home to coddle
The tree and needles, an indulgent notion
Or to take balm of season, toss on rubble,
And through removing it, end all. I cry, I weep—
I mourn—to toss the tree, to say “the end.”
A friend once... now this vacant seasonal spot,
Twas such a nice view. Aid of supplication,
Tow’ring in its stand. Oh fie! So sweet—
It greets—the branches gleam. No, not a shrub.
There in that glow of green, those dreams did come
When we saw parcels tucked, hid under foil,
That hope I saw. Here I reject
Our 'toss a holiday with speed," brief life.
So vile to trim the tree and short its time.
A December song, the fat man’s approved scene,
The bulbs of divine glow, the light display,
The incidents of glitter, and the paws
So playful, bat at all the low dangling bait.
Doth glee, itself, sleep past holiday date
In a box, packed in? Doth this symbol scare?
Let stand and tend past the ordained date!
Deny the dread of keeping after time.
For understanding, hear me. For what law
Says send the tree to die? Puzzles me still.
Why break this evergreen whose ills are none?
Must throw out, brothers? What's this thought made of?
Its presents, tree kept us happiest toward all,
And to the tree, adieu? Sad resolution
Plays empty chord of the days past, the blot
On saddened eyes that once bright for moment,
With lights, a star... their joy now tossed away,
And sits on frozen pavement--- See how now
The year is calling you, “Come to my horizon
But lose that tree you tended.”

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   6
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - January 05, 2012 - Report this comment
Humorous comparison...and very well done
John Barry - January 05, 2012 - Report this comment
Tree-mendous.
Puto - January 05, 2012 - Report this comment
You really spruced up the site with this one - 5s
Dave W. - January 05, 2012 - Report this comment
Love the title....masterfully written..and let's not forget 'bout those pesky wreaths that stay up 'til Easter or the 4th of July
WarrenB - January 05, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks all for the nice notes. Thought I'd 'branch' out a little with this one.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/williamshakespearehamlet8.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1297