The Lyrics
I feel happy
In Coxsackie(23),
Someone slap me, so happy I sang
Make it snappy
Cause the ladies they prefer Wetwang(67)
Lalalalala-la-la-la-lala
I feel famous
Stayed in Anus(2),
Not too heinous, that Anus, it’s best
Greg Louganis
Says ‘You gotta try the drinks in Brest(14)’
See there’s not a place that I haven’t been
Always in and out, I move fast
I gave Hell(37) a try
Saw the Town [of] Pie(50)
People ask me Why(69)
‘Cause it is a blast!
Don’t come knockin’
Stayed at Cock Inn(21)
It was rockin’, at Cock Inn, oh SNAP!
But I love
When I’m dropping into Deep Gap(24)
Now for a good time, get to Climax(20)
You’ll have the best time on the block
They ask “where is best?” I say Mount Mee(46)
But that’s only if you cannot handle Three Cocks(59)
Give Nipple(48) a try
Or dive into Muff(47)
And Threeway(60) is nice
I can’t get enough
I like Ta Ta Creek(57)
But Dildo(28) was weird
Now Ball Play(4)’s a treat
In Twatt(62), they have beards
Penn is such a treat
See Big Beaver(6)
After Intercourse(42), you can leave her
Greasy(35) was hot
Do Stop(29) I recall
Found Virginville(63)’s not
And hated Blue Balls(9)(10)(11)!
‘Cross America! ‘Even Overseas! Where?
Assinippi(2)!
It’s so pretty!
Take a trip-py, to gritty Bald Knob(3)
Here’s my tipp-y:
Visit Weener(66), it’ll do the job
Lalalalala-la-la-la-lala
Handsome Eddy(36)
Go get ready
Bobbin Head(12)-y, now steady, Blowhard(8)
It’s no kitty
Pussy Creek(51) demands a credit card
See there’s not a town where I can’t be found
[Fic-kl-in’ Knob(32)]
Look at all the travel’s I’ve planned
[Titlis(61) Sexmoan(53) - moan, moan, moan, moan...]
Don’t be shy in Fame(30)
Boring(13) isn’t lame
Fucking(34) isn’t tame
I’m in Happyland(37)
I like Busti(17)
Though it’s dusty
Feel like putty and Busti I thank
But I love
How I always end up in Wank(64)!
[PLACES LIST]
1 Anus, France
2 Assinippi, Massachusetts
3 Bald Knob, Arkansas
4 Ball Play, Tennessee
5 Beaver Lick, Kentucky
6 Big Beaver, Pennsylvania
7 Big Bone Lick State Park, Kentucky
8 Blowhard, Australia
9 Blue Ball, Delaware
10 Blue Ball, Ohio
11 Blue Ball, Pennsylvania
12 Bobbin Head Road, Australia
13 Boring, Oregon
14 Brest, France
15 Brilliant, Ohio
16 Bumpass, Virginia
17 Busti, New York
18 Butternuts, New York
19 Buttzville, New Jersey
20 Climax, Georgia
21 Cock Inn, UK
22 Condemned Bar, California
23 Coxsackie, New York
24 Deep Gap, Tennessee
25 Dickeyville, Wisconsin
26 Dickshooter, Idaho
27 Dicktown, New Jersey
28 Dildo, Canada
29 Do Stop, Kentucky
30 Fame, West Virginia
31 Fanny, West Virginia
32 Ficklin Knob, Kentucky
33 French Lick, Indiana
34 Fucking, Austria
35 Greasy, Oklahoma
36 Handsome Eddy, New York
37 Happyland, Oklahoma
38 Hell, Michigan
39 Hicksville, New York
40 Hookersville, West Virgina
41 Horneytown, North Carolina
42 Intercourse, Pennsylvania
43 Loveladies, New Jersey
44 Manassas, Virginia
45 Mount Gay, West Virginia
46 Mount Mee, Australia
47 Muff, Ireland
48 Nipple, Utah
49 Onancock, Virginia
50 Pie Town, New Mexico
51 Pussy Creek, Ohio
52 Ramsbottom, England
53 Sexmoan, Phillippines
54 Smackass Gap, North Carolina
55 Spread Eagle, Wisconsin
56 Sweet Lips Creek, Tennessee
57 Ta Ta Creek, Canada
58 The Bottle, Alabama
59 Three Cocks, Wales
60 Threeway, Virginia
61 Titlis, Switzerland
62 Twatt, Orkney, Scotland
63 Virginville, Pennsylvania
64 Wank, Free State of Bavaria, Germany
65 Wealthy, Texas
66 Weener, Germany
67 Wetwang, England
68 Whiskey Dick Mountain, Washington
69 Why, Arizona