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Song Parodies -> "Bombs, Bombs, Bombs! (Extended Version)"

Original Song Title:

"Bonds, Bonds, Bonds!"

Parody Song Title:

"Bombs, Bombs, Bombs! (Extended Version)"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

The official history of Germany's atomic bomb program and other WMDs is deliberately falsified. Apart from the original German A-Bomb research program that involved heavy water and uranium cubes that failed a chain reaction, there is also the SS Kammler restart in 1944 under "Black Plague" with goals of both a R-Bombe (Giant Bomb) and a small mini-nuke of 440kg to be carried by modified Bf 109s (SO Bf 109). But lets forget those and move on to other secret bomb projects. The Germans had two radiological dirty bombs at Ohrdruf, manufacture of new D-1 and D-2 missiles to carry the payloads, a Luftwaffe FAE, the SS Firedamp weapon of 60/40 fine coal dust/LOX with added reagent... and Goering's testimony at the Nuremberg Trials of the "Molecular Bomb" patented by Dr. Karl Nowak of Austria in 1943. Nowak's bomb is the most interesting b/c it involved supercondensed matter down to absolute zero that would be spread out over distance and ignited, producing the same damaging effects of an atomic bomb but minus radiation! The Firedamp bomb also was equal in force to the US A-bomb and a test bomb was detonated in Thuringia in March 1945. Another unknown bomb was detonated in the Baltic in March 1945 carried by an unknown 92 ft tall rocket (possible Peenemunde designed cluster rocket type adopted by Soviets). The LW had the bomb casings for the FAEs but had no experience with the fuel/air handling. No one wanted to carry the bomb so they were never mated. Same for German nerve gases that lay stockpiled and never used, esp. Tabun artillery shells and aerial bombs. My parody deals with all of these types which were taken mostly by the US as spoils of war along with designs for nuclear powered aircraft, ships, submarines, and powerplants. Germany knew what needed to be done but it was too late. The transportation system was destroyed and there were a lack of suitable bombers to carry such devices. Uranium and other advanced secret weapons were shipped to Japan via U-boat instead.
Listen up, there’s a story to tell
‘Bout all the bombs from Nazi hell
Things that never were used in war
But gave the US tech galore... and more!

A-bomb research underway
Bad graphite, heavy water sway
Special forces, bombing raids
The right path then oft-delayed

But Germans had other plans
FAEs, Firedamp weapons
Radiologicals and condensed matter
Karl Nowak like a Mad Hatter!

[Chorus]
Bombs, bombs, bombs!
Variety of WMDs
Bombs, bombs, bombs!
Products of Nazi Germany

The FAEs the Luftwaffe had
Bomb casings not filled- was sad
Handling in tests went bad
Stockpiles in depots sat on land

SS Firedamp weapon was cruel
60/40 coal dust/LOX as fuel
Waxy reagent added too
Mixture was so unstable-reviewed

Then there was “Molecular Bomb”
Nowak’s ultra-dense matter “Kong”
Compressed down absolute zero
Ignition heat, blast- no rads to fear tho’

[Chorus Mod I]
Bombs, bombs, bombs!
Variety of WMDs
Bombs, bombs, bombs!
High-tech of Nazi Germany

Most bombers couldn’t carry them
Scared the troops more than nerve gas Tabun
Or N-Material at Falkenhagen
Hitler and Goering had a problem:

Too complex!

[Delivery systems not ready yet]

They had run out of time
US got the secrets- prime

[Chorus Mod II]
Bombs, bombs, bombs!
Variety of WMDs
Bombs, bombs, bombs!
Spoils from Nazi Germany

GONE!
GONE!
GONE!

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Pacing: 4.3
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.3

Total Votes: 6

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