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Song Parodies -> "What A Face I Saw In Cheeses"
Original Song Title:
"What A Friend I Have In Jesus"
Original Performer:
Traditional Hymn
Parody Song Title:
"What A Face I Saw In Cheeses"
Parody Written by:
Phil Alexander
The Lyrics
The story of the Virgin Mary in Grilled Cheese, for sale on eBay. Honest.
What a face I saw in cheeses, it was the Virgin, that I swear
I think I'll stick it up on eBay and see what the market'll bear
The bidding opened at three thousand, not bad now that the toast's all hard
It swiftly passed through seven figures... Cheeses christ, oh thank the Lard
This cheesy sandwich helps me gamble, I've won oh, thousands with it there
By why does Mary help the dice fall? Like I should know.. why should I care?
So if you'd like this Holy Rarebit, please bid what you think it's worth
It's now more than a million dollars... you see! It brings luck not a curth
Oh, shame another bid retraction, my hopes could not have got much higher
But still, one hundred million bucks is more than your av'rage PayPal buyer
And, look! It's only just been nibbled, it's really only bitten once
Who'd want to eat the Virgin Mary? A million-dollar losing dunce!
I know it is the Blessed Virgin - I'm sure, I've got her picture here
The photo that I bought on eBay, it's very old so none too clear
So when you go toasting your sandwiches, afore you eat them please regard
Oh, what a face I saw in cheeses, cheeses christ, Oh thank the Lard
I think I'll stick it up on eBay and see what the market'll bear
The bidding opened at three thousand, not bad now that the toast's all hard
It swiftly passed through seven figures... Cheeses christ, oh thank the Lard
This cheesy sandwich helps me gamble, I've won oh, thousands with it there
By why does Mary help the dice fall? Like I should know.. why should I care?
So if you'd like this Holy Rarebit, please bid what you think it's worth
It's now more than a million dollars... you see! It brings luck not a curth
Oh, shame another bid retraction, my hopes could not have got much higher
But still, one hundred million bucks is more than your av'rage PayPal buyer
And, look! It's only just been nibbled, it's really only bitten once
Who'd want to eat the Virgin Mary? A million-dollar losing dunce!
I know it is the Blessed Virgin - I'm sure, I've got her picture here
The photo that I bought on eBay, it's very old so none too clear
So when you go toasting your sandwiches, afore you eat them please regard
Oh, what a face I saw in cheeses, cheeses christ, Oh thank the Lard
While I was writing this, the bidding went up to $99,999,999.00... but this bid for some strange reason was retracted. There have been quite a few $1M bids which have also been retracted, but the current bidding is at $69k. Not bad for a toasted cheese sarnie.
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 2 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 5 | 17 | 19 | 18 |
User Comments
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I don't know the original song, but I have heard of this story. Sorry to see that "Mr. 1" has shown up.
This is hilarious..and cleverly concocted...Someone "Oned" you...tried to put holes in your cheese and make it swiss...but I'm going all the whey on this and give "5"'s
For those who DKTOS, I got the lyrics/midi here: http://my.homewithgod.com/heavenlymidis/hymns.html (to be honest, I used this page to decide which hymn to use for the song). Amusing aside: I didn't realized 'till I played the MIDI that this is the tune that Billy Connolly used for his parody "Jesus Christ I'm nearly 40" ;-)
P.T. Barnum would love this. Good job, Phil. Love the title.
Gotta agree with John Barry! Funny stuff, Phil!
a hilarious parody over an even more hilarious situation...my favorite story like this concerned an image of jesus which suddenly appeared on a wall somewhere in texas after a heavy rain...it turned out that the rain washed over some crud and revealed an old willie nelson concert poster...
Had to go looking for that, Alvin - looks like it was in Guatemala City in 1987... wonder if that's worth a parody, too?
Hilarious! The last line is classic. If the French word for "grease", "graisse", is pronounced " grice ", then it could have been "cheeses graisse, Oh thank the Lard".
As far as I know, the French word _graisse_ sounds more like "gress" or even "grace" in English phonetic spelling..."Amazing _Graisse_", anyone?
Back to the parody though...there were a few pacing flaws, but the story and OS choice were pretty funny. 4-5-5.
Back to the parody though...there were a few pacing flaws, but the story and OS choice were pretty funny. 4-5-5.
Excellent Phil! I haven't looked yet on Ebay, but I was hearing about this all day yesterday on the radio, and 4KQ was promoting the story by offering $1000. for any supernatural images brought into their station. ;-D
No cheesy Philling! Always sad to see Christianity defamed by tacky non-biblical superstition. Makes a good parody though :-) And since Jesus had brothers, why do Catholics still call her the virgin mary?
Excellent parody, took me a few seconds to remember the tune all the way through but I really, honestly, laughed out loud at the end of the first verse. Very topical and very funny, nice one!
This parody is comedic gold(en-brown toast, dipped in ketchup). I love this parody ... and I love grilled cheese! Hmm, 'Supernatural Grilled Cheese' .... it sounds like a band name doesn't it?
"Thank the lard"...your wordplay is priceless, Phil! 555
Thank you Kristof, but I can't take full credit for the "Thank the lard" lyric: it was on a messageboard for this story, and I couldn't resist using the line.
Steven - I guess that calling her the "Ex-Virgin Mary" wouldn't have the same ring to it ;-)
FuNkY mOnKeY - there's quite a few "Virgin Mary Grilled Cheese" spoofs popping up, but a band? Now, *there*'s an idea...
Steven - I guess that calling her the "Ex-Virgin Mary" wouldn't have the same ring to it ;-)
FuNkY mOnKeY - there's quite a few "Virgin Mary Grilled Cheese" spoofs popping up, but a band? Now, *there*'s an idea...
there's a lot to this Phil...
the Virgin Mary Nancy Taal has always been linked with cheese, esp M.N.Thal (boom boom) - it's late - take the 5s
the Virgin Mary Nancy Taal has always been linked with cheese, esp M.N.Thal (boom boom) - it's late - take the 5s
Cheeses they show me... Excellent parody. Simply beautiful. Praise the Lard!
Yeah, I saw it , too. That's nothing. I have a fruitcake with a picture of Osama Bin Laden that came from Ralph's bakery.
Just to keep up-to-date: after several bids in excess of $1,000,000 (not to mention a few dozen others) had been retracted, it finally sold for $28,000 - now, THAT's an expensive bit of toast.
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