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Song Parodies -> "What A Friend We Have In Sneezes"

Original Song Title:

"What A Friend We Have In Jesus"

Original Performer:

Traditional hymn

Parody Song Title:

"What A Friend We Have In Sneezes"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

What a friend we have in sneezes
Clears out dust and pollen air
Allergies the winds may carry,
Are expelled with forceful flair..
Sneezes are involuntary,
Anytime or anywhere..
Just hope not to a brain surgeon,
While his scalpel needs much care

Viruses invade our noses
Inflammed cells will sense them near
Then nerve endings send a message
To brain; "Get them out of here!"
Chest now squeezes lungs, and pharynx
Shuts down to prevent mouth air..
Sneezes know our every weakness
Most lend backup with a pair..

Nasal passages, like gun barrels,
Blast great force beyond compare
Some can't sneeze with their eyes open
Others can, but aren't aware..
Nearby friends will say, "Gesundheit!"
German for "God Bless" they'll share
What a friend we have in sneezes
Afterwards, there's solace there..

When our nose is heavy-laden
Good to know a guard is there
Speeds up to one-sixty meters
Blows the bad guys from their lair
Now, clean oxygen we're breathing,
Till some new invasions dare
What a friend we have in sneezes
Sneezes give us urgent care

Sneezes give us urgent care..

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   11

User Comments

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Andria - May 26, 2009 - Report this comment
As a longtime allergy and hay-fever sufferer, I can definitely understand the premise of this work, and I only know the OS from being dragged into church as a little girl. Certainly an improvement on the OS in my opinion, and here are 555 packages of Benadryl.
Phil Alexander - May 26, 2009 - Report this comment
Can I put the opposing view:

It's not a friend we have in sneezes
They aid the viruses and bugs
Which end up causing nasty symptoms
That aid the sales of Pfizer drugs
So when you clear your nasal passages
Be careful where the bogies fall
It's not a friend we have in sneezes
Snot a friend to us at all

alvin - May 26, 2009 - Report this comment
my fave of the day
Mark Scotti - May 26, 2009 - Report this comment
I was just working on an allergy parody, and this "infectious" gem is prompting me to complete it! 555 sneezes at you...
MadameAhhhChoo - May 26, 2009 - Report this comment
Sometimes a great sneeze is just what we need, Sir, L'Air de Farce!
AFW - May 26, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks, to everyone
John Barry - May 27, 2009 - Report this comment
I'm not allergic to the parody. In fact, I really like it.

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